Page 117 of My Sweet Dollie, You Have to Love Me
“If we die, we won’t have to be here anymore.” Those pitiful words from a tiny girl bring tears to my eyes.
“I don't wanna be here, either, Dollie, but if you don’t eat, we don’t make it. Duggan will never understand why you didn’t come home. Mom and Dad will cry forever, and Annabelle won’t have a best friend anymore. Just one, Dollie. One vegetable in the dark, where you can’t see the color.”
CHAPTER 28
Ambrose—present day
Lucky:
I think we’re at a would-be raunchy chapter. Your thoughts?
Itry to relax in my room, still on edge from earlier. Today is the second time this week that Dollie’s seen me without a top on. The look of disgust over my wounds rattled me more than I’d like to admit.
Still, I didn’t dress after cutting. Didn’t risk the voice in my head screaming about infections. Not this time or a few days back.
Fresh wounds bleed out as I lie on my bed with the lights out. I haven’t dressed since I showered. I showered after seeing her, drowning out her sadness with a bottle of wine that Annabelle had left behind. I could have stayed, hung around, and told her it wouldn’t help, but why be a hypocrite.
I do the same thing weekly, drink until I’m numb.
Instead, I came up here to wash her judgment away—maybe two hours ago.
It didn’t work, so I cut my wounds open again and showered.
It isn’t because of her.
It’s because how I feel for her can’t compare to anything else.
I can’t help the hope I felt when I slid that note under the bathroom door. I thought maybe she’d have called me down by now, even if just for a coffee or something. I thought she’d give in to her fears of the house and use something meaningless as an excuse not to be alone.
Nothing.
She never wants to speak to me.
Until… I’m Lucky.
That’s why I’m the one to continue our conversations.
I’m deep into chapter twenty-five. Dollie is a little slower, savoring every detail, and I know that because she tells me her thoughts about every paragraph. Some things she says, I remember from our previous reads and my last message, kinda feels like I’m tainting that memory.
I shouldn’t have agreed to this, plucking out the possible would-be raunchy chapters.
But honestly, I’d agree to anything she asks, and the more I talk to her, the harder it is to stay away.
God, I’m going to hell.
This is your sist—there is no way I’ll let myself finish that thought. I replace it with another. This is the person I need to live because surviving isn’t enough these days.
I need this.
Need her.
Dollancie:
Was it her saying that she preferred fierce favors to anything more tender? What do you think fierce favors would be in this day and age?
Lucky:
I’m really not sure I can answer that without you thinking I’m like every other guy on MateMatch.
