Page 7 of Enamored
“Is that the girl from years ago?” Kasey asks in a hushed tone.
I nod my head, never taking my eyes off Lana.
She stops in front of me and all but ignores Kasey. She takes a deep breath and plasters a fake smile on her face. “Mr. Ellis, I have some designs I thought you might want to take a look at. Let me know if I’m heading in the same direction as your vision.”
“I was going to take Kasey and Maddie here into the field to see the horses. Why don’t you come, and you can show me out there?” She looks between the three of us and bites her lip.I forgot how adorable she looks when she does that.Snap out of it. She’s a distraction I can’t afford.
“No, you’re busy with your family. This can wait a while. Why don’t we schedule some time later today or tomorrow morning to review it?”
I don’t bother correcting her that Maddie isn’t mine or that Kasey and I aren’t together. “No, it’s fine. Come on. You loved the field when you were here last time, remember?”
She flinches. From the corner of my eye, I see Holden straighten and clench his fist. Yeah, I’m being an asshole. I need to keep away from her. I need both of us to go our separate ways when this is over. She needs to go back to Boston and find someone who won’t tie her down—literally. Because if I ever get the chance to be with her again, she’s not leaving my side.
“Oh, Lana, are you joining us?” Mom asks as she steps off the porch.
She opens her mouth to say something, and Maddie interrupts, reaching out for Mom. “Grammie,” she giggles. Mom scoops her up in her arms and kisses the top of her head.
Lana hardens her stare at me and stands up tall. She’s not going to turn down my mom’s request.“Sure. I’d like to be able to show Tristan my designs so I can change them if need be and can get out of your hair.”
“You’re not imposing, dear. We’re happy to have you on the ranch. Tristan hasn’t stopped talking about the fact that you’re here.”Are you kidding me, Mom?She smiles at me and feigns innocence as I stare at her in shock. Shock morphs to anger as soon as Lana speaks.
“I’m sure he’s just excited about the new designs. I have nothing to do with it.” She smirks and raises her eyebrow at me.
God, she has no idea how difficult she’s making this. She has no fucking clue what her being here is doing to me and how much I want to pull her over my knee for saying something so incredibly stupid. I’m fighting my feelings tooth and nail to do what’s best for her, and she has the audacity to think so little of me.
“Get in the truck, Lana.” I leave no room for discussion as I open the bed of the truck and place Maddie inside. Kasey climbs in after her, and I hold my hand out for Lana. She looks at Kasey and Maddie, who is settled between her mom’s legs. I lean closer, and my lips brush the shell of her ear. My blood pumps fast as I try to contain my excitement from being this close to her. “It will be fun, I promise.”
She turns her head and narrows her eyes at me. “Don’t make promises you can’t keep.” She climbs in and sits opposite of Kasey, looking anywhere but at her. Holden jumps in back, and Mom gets into the front with me. I watch Lana in the rearview mirror as she leans into Holden, smiling and laughing with him like they have been friends forever. I’m the outsider, and it fucking sucks.
* * *
Mom is resting under a tree, watching the horses along with a few guests from town. Holden takes Maddie into the field, letting her pick some wildflowers as Kasey sets up her camera. She’s only in town for another few days before she heads home to California.
Jackson, her husband, will be home from his final tour in the middle east, and they have been talking of moving back home. Kasey wants Maddie to be closer to family, and she wants to be able to help take more pictures to sell at the ranch. I never thought I’d see the day when she wants to give up California.
Kasey has been good to me. When Lana left, I didn’t want to do anything or see anyone, but she was there helping to pick up the pieces. When Mom got sick, she came home to help out around the ranch. She met Jackson here of all places.Black Stallion Ranchseems to do that for people. Molly even came out to visit Holden once or twice, but Holden sent her on her way, claiming it was best for her. I never thought that one would last anyway.
I sit beside Lana, pointing out to the horses. “What do you think? Pretty cool, huh?” Holden discreetly stands and walks away, leaving the two of us to talk alone.
She smiles and nods. “Yeah, it’s cool. How long ago did they come back?”
“Right around the time Mom got sick. She said it’s a gift from Grandpa.”
She turns to look at me, her lips turned down into a frown. “What happened? She looks so frail. Holden told me she was sick.” Her voice is quiet as she speaks. I want to take her hand in mine but pull back at the last second. I focus my gaze on Mom, trying to find the words to tell her.
“Cancer. Took a toll on us and the ranch. She’s a survivor, though. Tough as nails. About five years ago, she was diagnosed. Between doctor’s appointments and hospital stays, the ranch began to suffer. People weren’t coming the way they used to because we had to make cutbacks. I took over, and Holden invested to keep the place running.
“We’re trying to find ways to bring more money into the place. That’s why we opened the shop, and Kasey takes pictures of the ranch and the horses. I thought more cabins would help so more people could stay for only a night or so. More turnover, but also more revenue.”
She places her hand on my knee, her eyes fixed on me. “I’m sorry, Tristan. I had no idea it was that bad.” She looks out at Holden and Maddie, then drops her hand from my knee. I miss her soft touch. “Your daughter is cute. She looks like her mom.”
I grin and shake my head. “She’s not my daughter.” Her head whips in my direction, and I see her confusion. Her face is scrunched, and she opens her mouth to speak, but I stop her. “I didn’t correct you, but she’s not mine. Kasey’s married, and when he’s away, she comes back and visits.”
“But she called your mom Grammy?”
“Our families are close, remember?” She nods slowly. “There’s nothing going on with me and Kasey. We’re friends, and that’s it. She’s very happy with her life the way it is.”
We sit in silence as she ponders what I said. When she finally speaks, it’s the one question I honestly can’t answer. “And are you happy withyourlife?”
