Page 102 of Finding Jacob
“Sadie, do you know if I’m insured in the Bentley?” I asked.
“I would imagine so; it has an any driver policy. Do you want me to check?”
“If you don’t mind. I thought I might take Paloma away for a long weekend. I just feel like I need a break right now.”
“I don’t blame you. Give me five minutes,” she replied, and bustled off.
I sent a text to Nathan.
Hey, not sure if I’m running away or not, but I need a long weekend by the sea to think and just... breathe. Soon as I’ve booked somewhere, I’ll let you know, of course.
He replied after about ten minutes.
I can understand. I can drive you if you want.
I replied that I would drive myself, but I’d make sure he knew where we were. I googled holiday lets and eventually found one available for the coming weekend. A cancellation had occurred and the two-bedroom cottage on the beach in Sandbanks, Poole, showed up. Without thinking, I booked and paid for it. I then panicked. I didn’t have any travel items for Paloma. I brought up Amazon and bought some items, starting with a travel cot.
I showed the cottage to Sadie. “My son lived near there, said it was lovely. Bit of a millionaire’s playground, apparently.”
I hadn’t known she had children. In fact, other than what she did for me and the house, I didn’t really know much about her life full stop.
“Would you let me cook a meal for you and Bill one day?” I asked.
“Of course, we’d love that.” Her smile was broad. I couldn’t do without them both and I wanted them to feel appreciated. I also wanted to get to know them on a personal level, and not juststaff.
“Excellent. When I get back, we’ll do that.”
Later that night, I lay in bed feeling a little excitement about heading off in the morning. I hadn’t taken a holiday on my own ever. I had a book to read, an idea germinating in my mind, and Paloma to keep me occupied. More than ever, I just wanted to sit by the sea and breathe in the air. I remembered as a child many holidays spent in Cornwall in a caravan or a chalet. Tangled hair and salty skin were the norm. I fondly remembered my father playing bingo with me. Funnily, or maybe not, I didn’t remember my mother or sister with any kind of fondness. The only thing that brought a smile to my lips was my sister entering a beauty contest and coming last. She threw the biggest strop and my mum ended up having a row with the judges.
My phone beeped and I reached over for it. I expected it to be Nathan and my heart stopped beating when I read it.
Hey, I missed your texts today. I don’t deserve you, I know that, but they give me hope.
That was it, nothing more. My hands shook and I felt the wetness of tears on my cheeks. I pushed myself up into a sitting position and just read, and then read again. I didn’t think I could reply at first. I hadn’t heard from Jacob for nearly six months.
Six whole months of me texting twice a day and getting no reply. The day I don’t, the day I decide I might need to think about my future without him, he responds.
My mind was in turmoil. I wanted to speak to someone but felt it wrong to call Nathan. I dialled Dory.
“Hey, what’s up?” she said sleepily.
“I’m sorry to call so late. Where are you, by the way?” I’d noticed the ringtone suggested she was abroad.
“Kenya.”
I wasn’t expecting that answer. “Jesus, I’m sorry. I have no idea what the time is. What are you doing there?”
“Helping Louis with a housing project. He does this every year and I’m expected to step up a little since the other twit has been sidelined.” She laughed. Louis was heir to the throne, his brother, the twit as she referenced him, was the prince Jules had dated.
“Oh, nice. Say hello. Jacob texted me.”
“What? Hold on, let me get up,” she replied.
“No don’t, it’s late, I guess. I just wanted to ask you, what do I do?”
“You reply, you silly girl. Tell me you’re not seriously contemplating what to do?”
Her voice was stronger, I guessed my news had woken her fully.
