Page 80 of Drew
“What?” I ask, encouraging her to continue. My nerves are on edge just waiting to react. I take a moment to look her over with care. Nothing seems out of place, but I’ll hold off until she explains what’s wrong.
“I just had the date from hell!” she practically shouts. “Hell, I tell you… I mean I didn’t think it could get any worse, but no… the train wreck kept rolling, and I couldn’t get the fuck off the tracks fast enough.”
This doesn’t sound so bad, so I relax a little into the couch and glance at Abby to take the lead from here. Wait…Is she covering her face to conceal a laugh?
I can’t give it more thought because Sydney keeps steam rolling the conversation. “First, Brad. Yes, his actual fucking name is Brad… has been asking me out for weeks. I’d kept putting him off because we met when I served him his drink at the bar. You know that’s a hard pass. I never date guys who ask me out there. I never know if it’s the alcohol talking or if they think I’m an easy mark.” She takes a deep breath then continues to ramble. “But fucking Brad was persistent. We ended up seeing one another on campus one day and started talking. We’d bump into each other often, and he kept asking me out. But our schedules never worked. He told me how he wanted to take me to a nice dinner and get to know me better. Finally, we both had tonight free, so I thought, why not take a chance on him…” Sydney stops and stares at the ceiling, taking deep breaths to calm herself.
“Okay…” Abby draws out. “So, what happened?”
“You know those 80s movies I love so much? Well, fucking Brad was like the ultimate douche, times a million, from one of those. He insisted he pick me up, which I thought was a good start. Then he took me to one of the nicest restaurants in town. Once again, I must admit I was impressed. Though I could care less about fancy restaurants, I appreciated his effort. The date starts out typical, and then it takes a freaking nosedive like you wouldn’t believe. Apparently,Brad…”
Yes, she says his name like an expletive, and I find myself mirroring Abby’s expression to keep myself from laughing. The girl’s worked up. I almost feel sorry for Brad. But still… I’d better hold off on judgement.
“Well… how do I put this?” She tilts her head to the ceiling, like it holds all the answers. “Let’s see… he’s not only notoriously cheap, but he’s a deadbeat dad.”
“What?” Abby gasps. “Explain.”
“Brad apparently has a two-year-old who he never sees because the decent guy that he is, doesn’t like to spend the gas money to drive three hours back to his hometown to see said child. He had the audacity to go on for twenty minutes telling me how he thinks the kid is too young to know any better, and all he does is cost money when he gets him anyway. So, why bother to show up at all. Seriously. How can someone say this about their child?”
“Sounds like a winner,” Abby deadpans, but I still can’t see why this date was so horrible.
“Oh, you’re telling me.” Sydney’s sarcasm’s thick by this point. “When we got to the restaurant, he specifically told me to order anything I’d like. I ordered my favorite, chicken marsala and some mixed vegetables, while he ordered some crab puffs as a starter and the shrimp scampi. At first, when he’d mentioned having a kid with his girlfriend from high school, I was okay with it. People don’t always stay together. But then when he went on and on about how much of an inconvenience this poor child was, I was done and couldn’t wait for the check to come fast enough. I purposely told the waiter I was done as soon as Brad took his last bite to hurry things along.”
“God, what a loser,” I mumble under my breath, unable to keep my thoughts in.
“Exactly.” Sydney pins me with wide eyes. “But, I haven’t even gotten to the worst part.”
“Seriously?” Abby interrupts. “How can it get any worse?”
“No. When the check comes, fucking Brad gets out his phone to use his calculator. He divided our check by item. He had the audacity to charge me for my meal, my drink, and forty percent of the crab puffs because I ate four of the ten. He was kind enough to split the tax in half and only calculated for a ten percent for a tip.”
“You’re kidding me,” I say in disbelief after picking my jaw up from the floor.
“No.” She shakes her head. “I wish I were. Seriously, I can’t make this shit up if you paid me.”
“How did you get home?” Leave it to Abby to be practical.
Sydney sits up taller, and she smiles wickedly. “Oh, I got up from the table, walked over to the waiter, and handed him sixty bucks, which was more than my portion of the bill, by the way. I told him my date was a total cheapskate and not to let him know how much I’d paid. Stick him with the entire bill and tell him I’ll find my own way home. I was out the door and in an Uber within minutes. I’d already ordered one when Brad got out his calculator.”
Holy shit. Sydney’s a badass through and through.
Still shaking my head in disbelief I chuckle at my next thought. “I’m sure Brad was sweating bullets when he found out he’d been stuck with the bill.”
“Serves him right,” Abby pipes in. “God, what a dick move! I’m so sorry that happened to you.”
Sydney groans loudly as she flops back in her chair. “Uggh, I am so over guys. I am officially on a dick-diet until further notice. Men suck.”
“Not all of them.” Abby squeezes my hand and smiles apologetically.
Sydney looks over to me. “No offense, Drew, but men are total dicks, and I’m done with them.”
“Hey, I’m not a ‘fucking Brad.’” I use air quotes to tease. “But I totally get why you’d want a break after that.”
“I’m done with trying. Every guy I think I may be interested in is either a liar, cheater, and now a cheapskate. You might be the only decent one left.”
Chuckling, I roll my eyes. “We’re not all douches. But thanks for the vote of confidence.”
Sydney’s quiet for a long moment then suddenly jumps out of her chair, catching me off guard. “I think I’ll go for a run and let you get back to your evening.”
