Page 9 of Tis the Season for Tentacles
Plus, writing is a way for me to avoid thinking about the sad state of my nonexistent love life and my uncertain future.
Needing to stretch my legs a little, I figure I might as well begin my next round of reconnaissance and pull on my backpack—packed with essential supplies—and start to hike up a nearby ridge.
When I get to the top, I look over the side and survey the valley below.
Everything appears still in the quiet of the night, but I blink a few times when I see under the faint glow of moonlight what looks like dust beginning to churn in the distance.
I frown. The weather report didn’t indicate any impending dust storms. A quick check of my phone confirms the night is clear and the wind is calm.
I take off my glasses and rub my eyes before putting them back on and staring hard.
The dust is moving in a line, but I don’t see a vehicle of any kind, which is even more bizarre. Reaching into my jacket pocket, I pull out my night-vision binoculars so I can get a better look.
Yes, I am that nerd. Don’t judge.
With my binoculars, I can more easily study the moving dust, but I was right—there’s no sign of a vehicle. I can’t think ofany animal that would be moving that fast either. In fact, even from this distance, it seems like whatever is causing the dust is moving faster than should be humanly possible.
Naturally, that’s when it happens.
Where once there seemed to be nothing, a ramp of some kind all of a sudden descends to the ground out of thin air. The air around it shimmers, and I watch as an odd-looking vehicle reminiscent of a Smart Car appears and ascends the ramp.
I whip out my phone and start taking as many pictures as possible.
“Holy shit. Holy shit, holy shit,” I whisper under my breath.
It’s got to be an alien ship. And it has a motherfreaking cloaking device!
My soul sings. IknewI was right about this. Aliens really are here on Earth!
I keep watching in complete awe, my binoculars letting me get a good view of things inside what seems to be a cargo bay. Someone gets out of the odd little vehicle that went in the ship, and I’m shocked to see that they appear to be human.
Not paying attention to my feet, I take a step forward as if to get a closer look only to stumble.
The next instant, I find myself tumbling down the side of the ridge like Wesley inThe Princess Bride, only far less gracefully and shouting, “Sonofabitch!”
Eventually, I land in a dusty, painful heap on top of my still attached backpack.
Once my lungs start working again, I carefully survey my body. It would not be good if I broke anything while alone out here in the desert.
I wiggle my toes and my fingers. So far, so good.
After some additional cautionary attempts, I’m able to move my legs and arms without any difficulty, but I’ve definitely got some bruises that are going to be pretty painful later.
Glancing up, I see that, thankfully, the fall wasn’t as far as it seemed when it was happening.
Although I hope I haven’t broken anything inside my backpack. I do have some expensive equipment in there, including my laptop.
Just when I’ve decided to stop wallowing and try to roll myself over and get to my feet, I hear a strange vibrating hum start all around me.
“What the?—”
A bright beam of light shoots down from the sky and surrounds me, damn near blinding me in the process.
The very air seems to radiate with invisible energy, and I realize my body is shaking too.
And it’s not from what is evidently a tractor beam that I now find myself in.
No, it’s from my own uncontained excitement.
