Page 59 of The Fear of Falling
“Not if you give yourself right of first refusal for a first book. Put it in the workshop contract. And everyone who signs up gets a signed book and swag.”
“That would fit our focus of fostering community,” I say as I catch on to what he’s saying. My thoughts start building on each other, growing my excitement for this idea. “Not only are we creating a kinship between our authors, but we would also be encouraging external support. Our readers will see that the authors actually care about people, not just sales.”
“‘A rising tide lifts all boats,’” Benson says with a nod.
“That’s kind of genius, Benson,” I say, looking down at the tote he handed me.
He laughs. “That’s why they pay me the big bucks. Except you, of course.”
I frown, looking up at his face again. “I’m not paying you big bucks?”
“No. You’re not paying me at all.”
Wait. Is he telling me that I not only lost him a client last night, but I’m also not paying him to help our company? My jaw drops, but based on his growing smile, he finds my shock amusing. “Benson! We should be paying you!”
He laughs, shaking his head. “I’m doing this as a favor to an old friend,” he says, and then he lifts my hand to his lips, pressing a kiss to my knuckles. His eyes slowly drop to our hands, resting there for a long moment before he meets my gaze again with a heated look in his eyes. It’s the same look he gaveme in Italy right before he kissed me, and my breath catches in my lungs as he slowly leans closer.
Maybe I’m not well-versed in non-romantic business relationships, given I started a company with my boyfriend, but that is not the kind of look someone gives their coworker if he isn’t hoping for something more.
“And I’m doing this,” he says, his voice husky, “because his co-owner is super cute when she’s calling me a genius, and she makes it so hard to remember my rules.”
I gasp, suddenly desperate to ask if he did mean to use the “I love you” emoji as my cheeks flame. But Benson is on his feet and leaving the closet before I draw in enough breath to speak.
“I have a call with your website designer in a minute,” he says as he disappears into the lobby, “but if you want to check out some Little Free Libraries while I’m on the call, it might be a good idea to scope out the options if that’s a direction you want to go with the swag.”
While I’m more than happy to move forward with this idea, how am I supposed to recover after that moment we just had? He’s left me feeling like I’m made of jelly. There’s more to this being bold thing than I anticipated because I never expected Benson to cross the line he so clearly drew on Monday. He seems far happier when he’s letting himself be authentic than when he’s pretending there’s nothing between us.
So maybe I should listen to my cousins and keep “getting my flirt on.” Maybe it won’t go anywhere beyond the next couple of weeks, but I’m not willing to waste the opportunity to try. I’ll be bold and hope he’ll take a chance on a future with me.
Benson has his laptop in hand and is on his way into Eric’s office when I finally get up and move to my office. “I’m going to commandeer Eric’s desk while he’s gone,” he explains before I can ask. “That way I won’t be a distraction. You still need to hire a social media manager, remember?”
Be bold, Avery Grace. “You are literally a walking distraction, Benson. You’re switching offices because you’re worried aboutmedistractingyou.”
Though his eyes go wide, he quickly shifts his expression to a smirk. “So that’s how you’re going to play, is it?”
I fold my arms. “I’m not playing, Bens.”
His lips quirk up. “I know you’re not.”
“You’re coming with me to check out the libraries.” I am genuinely impressed with my forceful tone.
He lifts an eyebrow. “Am I? Also, when is Lynda coming in?”
“Of course you are. It was your idea, so you get to see it through. And she isn’t. She called in sick, so it’s just you and me today, West.”
The knuckles on the hand gripping his laptop turn white, and Benson processes what I said for a long time before he finally swallows and nods. “Great.”
“I’m going to reach out to some of our biggest influencers and see if any of them are interested in doing our socials,” I tell Benson, though I’m not sure why. I’ll do it regardless of what he says. It’s not the way Eric would go about hiring a media manager, but if Eric can make universal decisions, I can do things my own way.
He smiles again, like he can’t help how much he is enjoying my newfound gumption. “That’s a great idea, Avery.”
Heat rises in my face, pushing me to keep being bold. “Let me know when you’re free, and we’ll go do that library tour.”
Benson’s jaw tightens, and I brace myself against him telling me no. But he nods. “Okay. I’m, uh, going to take that call now.”
“You do that.”
The instant he’s out of sight, I let out a little giggle that is way more understated than I feel.
