Page 52 of The Fear of Falling
Crap. That sounds like a big deal. “Is it too late to have the meeting?” I ask as guilt settles in. It’s my fault that he missed it, since I’m the one who convinced him to join me for dinner.
He shrugs. “If I didn’t have to grab my laptop, maybe I could make it work, but I left it at Rose & Quill.”
“Oh. I’m sor—”
“Don’t.” He reaches across the table and grabs my hand, which catches me so off guard that I freeze. As much as we’ve been talking over the last few hours, there has been zero physical contact. In fact, I’ve barely touched Benson since Italy, and he feels so familiar that it hurts. “It’s not your fault. I let myself get distracted.” Something burns in his gaze, like there’s more he wants to say, but when his phone buzzes on the table, he breaks our contact and starts reading, his shoulders falling. “Well, lost that chance…”
He may have said it’s not my fault, but I’m not sure I agree with him. “They won’t let you set up another meeting time?”
“It’s fine. I’m not hurting for clients.”
But something else is hurting him. “So this won’t cost you your job or anything?”
He chuckles, though the sound carries no amusement. “Nah. I have more than enough to keep me busy. Too bu…” He cuts himself off and looks at me. Was he about to say he’s too busy? Over the last several days, he’s spent as much time brainstorming with me and indulging my ideas as he has doing whatever he does as a consultant. He hasn’t seemed to mind, but what if I’ve only been making his job harder?
“Benson.”
“I should go.” He looks up as our server arrives with the cheesecake and sets it in front of him, and a line forms between his eyebrows as he stares at the dessert. “I, uh…” He pulls out his wallet and tosses a few bills onto the table, leaving the cheesecake behind as he slips from his chair and makes a beeline to the door.
The old Avery would let things end here. She would recognize that she made a mistake by distracting him and let him have his space. But I’m not that Avery anymore, nor do I want to be, and being bold tonight feltgood. Even if Benson left in a rush, he was having a good time before he remembered his meeting. He seemed happy.
He pushed me to be better in Florence. I think I need to do the same for him. Somehow.
Chapter 19
Benson
I’msuchanidiot.My conversation with Avery at the restaurant keeps running through my head as I lie in my hotel bed, keeping me awake though I’m desperate for some sleep. I let my guard down, and she wiggled her way through the cracks in my shields and put me at ease in a way only she can. What is it about this woman that makes me think I can be a different man?
My phone buzzes with a text, and shock jolts through me when I see that it’s Avery.
Avery:
Are you okay?
It is way too late for me to be texting her, but my thumb starts swiping out a reply. Stupid thumb.
Benson:
I’m fine. Sorry for the way I left.
Avery:
Is there anything I can do to help you get that client back?
Technically, I don’t know when I would have fit the client in to begin with, but I was going to try. They’re big enough that they could push me into the next level and give me connections with other international companies, which is exactly what I need to grow my business into something self-sustaining. But this particular client needs someone as soon as possible, so I would have had to cut my time with Rose & Quill short.
I would hate to leave Eric so quickly, idiot though he is, and it’s too late anyway now that I’ve missed the preliminary planning meeting. The client told me they would hire the other person they’ve been talking to because of the time constraints, so I’ll have to find someone else to give me the boost I need.
While I’m disappointed by this setback, I’m more upset that I so easily stepped over the line I wasn’t supposed to cross. All it took was one text from Avery; I couldn’t have said no to joining her for dinner if I’d tried. She makes it so easy to forget the reasons I should keep my distance, and talking to Avery is…easy. It has been from the beginning. Everything about being around her is easy.
Benson:
I promise it’s not a big deal.
Avery:
Are you sure? Because if it’s going to make paying your rent difficult or anything like that, we can give you a bonus for helping us.
