Page 82 of The Fear of Falling
My eyes find McKay first, sitting at the dining room table with his wife, Emily, under his arm. His hair is longer than the last time I saw him, curling at his ears, but otherwise he’s the spitting image of our dad, who sits a few seats over with a scrutinizing stare fixed on me.
Then there’s Mom, who stands frozen in the kitchen with a tray of chocolate chip cookies in her hands and her mouth gaping open as she looks from Avery to me. I’m waiting for her to drop the cookies in shock, but she barely seems to breathe. She might pass out before anyone says anything.
“Mom,” Kimball says, thankfully breaking the silence.
She blinks and hurriedly sets the tray on the stove, shucking off the oven mitts she’s wearing. “Sonny?”
My grip on Avery’s hand tightens involuntarily, and she squeezes me right back, giving me the courage to croak out, “Hey, Mom.”
She shuffles forward but stops halfway to us, like she’s suddenly unsure if she’s welcome any closer. Guilt pools in my belly; I haven’t given her many reasons to think I want her close. Her eyes finally shift to Avery and down to our hands, and her many questions flash across her face as she tries to figure out how to proceed. “Um, hello,” she says to Avery. “I’m Camille West. Benson’s mom.” She gestures to the table as Kimball takes the seat next to McKay with the look of someone expecting trouble. “This is my husband, Ray, and my older boys, Kimball and McKay. And my daughter-in-law, Emily.”
As everyone gives uncertain waves, Avery reaches out and shakes Mom’s hand, which to my horror is trembling. I know why I’m nervous, but why isMom? “I’m Avery,” Avery says in the gentle voice she uses every time she pries into my past, and it clearly works better on my mom than it does on me because Mom’s shoulders relax partway. “My car broke down,and Kimball found us on the side of the road. He offered to bring us here while we get it all figured out.”
Mom nods, her eyes darting to me every couple of seconds, though she’s mostly focused on Avery. “Yes, of course! It’s too late for you to be out there. How… Uh.” She looks down at my hand linked with Avery’s again, then looks up at me with wary eyes. “Are you…”
Are we what?She’s never going to ask. Mom gave up on asking me about dating at least five years ago, after a particularly heated conversation in which I told her I never planned to get married so she shouldn’t expect grandkids from me. Dad got after me for that one, telling me that Mom cried for a week and I should tell her I changed my mind, no matter that it was untrue. I ignored his request.
There’s a chance I’m starting to regret that decision.
“We work together,” I say, unwilling to give my mom any false hope. I don’t need another argument with my dad, even if a part of me wants to pretend I can be like my brothers when it comes to relationships. “Avery and her partner hired me to help their company.”
“Ask him how long he’s been in town,” Kimball says sharply.
Wincing, I shoot him a glare that he ignores, but the damage is already done.
Dad narrows his eyes. “How long have you been in town?”
Is it too late to follow Avery’s suggestion and wait outside for a car? Scrambling for a response that doesn’t make it sound like I’ve been avoiding my family, which I have been, I’m just about to tell my dad that I flew in last week—technically not a lie—when Avery jumps in with a much better answer.
“He’s been here for a couple of weeks, but I’ve been keeping him pretty busy. My company needs a lot of help, and he’s been a total lifesaver.”
“What line of work are you in?” McKay asks with a raised eyebrow. With the judging look in his eyes, it feels like he’s asking how she got mixed up with the likes of me.
But Avery smiles, unconcerned by the tension building between my family and me. “Publishing,” she says proudly. “One of my authors hit the best-sellers list this year, so we’re trying to expand and keep up with her popularity, which is where Benson has come in.”
“Since when do you know anything about publishing?” Dad asks gruffly, folding his arms.
I only halfway hold back a groan. “I don’t have to be an expert in every field I work in, Dad.” I’ve told him this a million times. “I do my research. I didn’t know anything about jewelry or telemedicine, but I still brought the companies—”
“Oh, it’s too late to be talking about work,” Mom says, and though her voice is soft, it feels like a slap. She never wants to hear about my job despite it being one of my biggest accomplishments I’m truly proud of. “Avery, you’re welcome to take a seat. Would you like some cookies? McKay and Emily were about to leave, but—”
“This is way more interesting than crashing in our hotel room,” McKay says with a chuckle. “We can hang a little longer.”
“Hotel?” I ask, furrowing my brow.
“Anniversary,” McKay explains simply and kisses Emily’s cheek. “Which is why the kids are downstairs. We plan to sleep in all morning long. Among other things.”
“McKay Alan!” Mom scolds, her cheeks turning pink as I resist the urge to palm my face. “Avery, forgive my son.”
“A sleepover with Grandma is the only way we can get another kid on the way,” McKay says with a wink, while Emily smiles and rolls her eyes.
As Mom gasps in horror, McKay and Kimball both start laughing and giving me looks that say they’re doing their bestto drive me away. It’s working, and if not for the late hour and lack of transport, I would be taking Avery as far from here as possible.
“Sit,” Kimball says, gesturing to the table. “We’ll behave.”
“Not likely,” I grumble, but I pull out a chair for Avery and take the seat next to her, sitting as close as I can without being on her chair. I’m half worried she’ll be so horrified by my family that she’ll run, but the other half of me desperately wants her to see what I deal with so she’ll finally understand why I can’t move back.
No matter how much I wish I could.
