Page 49 of Houston, We Have a Problem
“I need to sit,” I realize out loud when my vision dims at the edges.
I’m not sure how I get to a chair, but as soon as I sit down, I can breathe a little easier. Houston pulls up a second chair and sits knee-to-knee with me, and he waves at someone while I try to just breathe. What is wrong with me?
“Hey, try drinking some water.”
I look up right as a server hands him a glass, which he holds out to me with unwavering hands. He looks so steady, and I feel like I might fall apart at the seams. When I don’t move, he lifts the glass to my lips and carefully pours some over my tongue. The tenderness of the gesture pulls me up enough to take the glass for myself.
“Thank you,” I whisper, all too aware of the trembling in my fingers. “I feel ridiculous.”
“Traumatic events have that effect.” His bitter words come with some bite to them as well. “Are you good if I leave you here?”
I don’t want him to leave. Panic bubbles up again, and he must see it in my eyes because he smiles gently.
“I just want to see if I can get Callahan thrown out. It won’t take long.” He waits until I nod, and then he’s off, far calmer than he was before but with a determination in his steps that sends my heart racing.
By the time he comes back, I’ve emptied the glass of water and feel mostly myself again, though I do worry that I won’t be able to play Tamlin as easily as I usually do. This whole thing drained me in a way I’ve never experienced before, and I can’t help thinking about Houston’s use of the word trauma. Was he speaking from experience? Or was he just saying it to say it?
“Are you okay, Park?” he asks as he takes his seat again, his eyes fixed on mine like he’s searching for any sign that I might not be.
“I think so,” I tell him. “Thank you. Really. I don’t know what came over me.”
“Callahan came over you.”
Rolling my eyes, I manage a little smile. “Iknowthat, Briggs. I just mean when it comes to fight or flight, my response is usually fight. Not freeze.”
“Of course it is,” he replies dryly. “Callahan’s lucky he didn’t lose an eye.”
“I can’t argue with you there.”
“You’re usually so confident.” He frowns, as if he isn’t sure why he said that. He keeps talking, his words coming faster the longer he goes. “I mean, I saw what happened to O’Donohue. You didn’t even give him a second glance. I’m a little disappointed that it wasn’t you who gave him the broken nose directly. And at trivia night you didn’t once second-guessyourself when you knew the answer, even when I tried so hard to argue. It was…”
I raise my eyebrows when he doesn’t finish. “What was it?”
“Impressive,” he admits, and then more quietly he adds, “and attractive.” He coughs. “Don’t let guys like Callahan make you feel like you’re any less than you are.”
Holy mama, he is not making this easy. If he’d said this to Darcy, I would have had a better grasp of the meaning behind his words, but I have no idea what he’s intending Tamlin to get out of this. I’m not so sure he does either, with the way his eyebrows remain bunched up above his baby blues.
“You’re surprising, Houston Briggs,” I say, wishing I was feeling more confident, the way he sees Tamlin. This night could have looked so different if my life wasn’t split down the middle like it is. There wouldn’t have been this divide inside me, both sides wanting so badly to be a part of this man’s life but knowing it is impossible while the other person exists. Houston likes Darcy, I know he does, but there is so much about myself that I’ve had to hide to protect Tamlin and the career I’ve built. And he’ll never fall for the woman who could ruinhiscareer in a heartbeat if he gave me the right button to push.
The universe—and an ironclad NDA, which Connor unnecessarily reminded me about on Saturday—has decided we can never be together, and I hate that. For both of us.
“Now that you don’t look like you might pass out,” Houston says, flashing a dimpled smile that digs a knife into my chest, “how about we finish that dance? You can tell me about how you got into sports, and maybe your freakishly large knowledge base can get your mind off of the man I hope I never see again.”
It’s such a bad idea, but I’m too tired to say no. “I’d like that,” I say, taking his hand. Tonight, I don’t want to worry about how to move my hand or where to shift my weight when I stand.I don’t want to think about which part of me knows which facts. I just want to exist. To dance with Houston Briggs and have a night where I can just be me.
Chapter Nineteen
Houston
You know when there’s beensomething off balance in your life but you didn’t know about it until it all shifts and levels out? Well, that feeling is nauseating at first, but then it feels like I’m no longer just out of step of where I want to be.
Tamlin Park is human. Not only that, but she’s actually pretty funny when she gets going. I think it’s helping her to make jokes that contain thinly veiled insults toward me—insults I know she doesn’t mean because she bites her lip every time she says something, like she is cracking herself up.
Everything about her has relaxed while we’ve danced. I don’t know how long we’ve been out here on the dance floor, or at what point it started to feel like we fit together really well, but so much about this is easy. There’s no awkwardness or expectations, just a beautiful woman in my arms as we talk about some of my favorite subjects.
She tells me about getting her undergrad from Harvard—Harvard—and then getting her master’s from the University of Missouriwhileworking at Enhance. It’s no wonder she got to where she is while being so young when she’s insanely intelligent in a way I’ll never be. (I have to ask her how old she is, which she finds hilarious. She’s twenty-six, for anyone wondering.)
She doesn’t ask a thing about me, which could be because she already knows everything she wants to know, but I don’t think so. I think she is trying to put me at ease, telling me without telling me that she’s not dancing with me for a story. She’s dancing with me because she wants to, or to say thank you for saving her from Callahan. Whatever her reasons, I’m perfectly okay to keep holding her.
