Page 151 of Texting, Trouble & Touchdowns
Olivia: Soon. Sarah’s learning how to make friends and I’m rethinking all my career choices. Can I be a horse vet now?
Lucian: You’d look hot in breeches.
Olivia: Stop.
Lucian: Can’t. It’s your fault for looking like the opening scene of every movie about a woman who escapes to the country and accidentally falls in love with a grumpy ranch owner.
Olivia: Wait. Are you the grumpy ranch owner in this version?
Lucian: No. I’m the hot neighbor who steals your dog and makes you homemade lemonade while you’re fixing the fence.
Olivia: So what happens to the grumpy ranch owner?
Lucian: I don’t know, are you leaving me for him? I thought we had something special.
Olivia: You’re doing it again.
Lucian: What am I doing now?
Olivia: Either you make up shit I can’t follow or . . . you sext me. That’s your trend.
Lucian: You want me to sext you, baby?
Oliva: No, leave me alone. This is why you’re losing. You’re too distracted.
Lucian: Does this mean you’re coming back soon? I need you by my side.
Olivia: Depends. Will there be cheating board games and suggestive glances?
Lucian: Yes. And maybe later . . . a stable reunion. Just us. You, me, and the hayloft.
Olivia: You had me up until hayloft.
Lucian: Fine. You, me, and the heated blanket in the guest cottage. Better?
Olivia: There’s no such thing as a guest cottage in here.
Lucian: How about the ice rink.
Olivia: It’ll be freezing.
Lucian: You’re too picky, Doc. First you begged for a guest room because you’re not sleeping with me while we’re at my parents. As I said, we don’t need to sleep, we can just fuck all night. But now, you don’t want to do it anywhere.
Olivia: Wow. Romantic. Truly. Poetry.
Lucian: I’m just trying to create options. I’m a solution-oriented man.
Olivia: Your solutions involve frostbite and no structural headboards.
Lucian: You don’t need a headboard when you’ve got enthusiasm.
Olivia: You need therapy.
Lucian: Probably. But in the meantime, I have charm and a very aggressive sex drive.
Olivia: See, that’s the energy that made Aspen say I should keep a taser on hand.
Lucian: I’m insulted. I’m a very respectful man. I asked if you wanted me to sext you. Consent is key.
