Page 36 of Send It
“She’s at Lakeside helping Stassie chase off the drunks.”
He sneers, “I hate the girls closing. I wish Rick wouldn’t let that happen.”
He’s right. It’s not the safest. Luckily I know that Rick, the owner, and John, one of the bartenders, are also closing so I know they’re safe.
“Worried about Stas?” I push, trying to aggravate him.
He shakes his head, correcting me, “Mysister.”
“Not Stassie at all? Not even a little bit?”
He shoves my arm, knocking me off balance, “Maybe a teeny bit, but shut up.”
“Why are you fucking around with Mira when you are clearly obsessed with Stas?”
He drops his head with defeat, “Because bro, that’s Lincoln’s best friend. It wouldn’t be right. Lincoln would freak.”
“How do you know?” I ask. “I don’t think Lincoln would care.”
He stares at me blankly for a moment before shaking his head, “Because I would freak. Imagine if it were you and Lincoln.”
My heart constricts so tight in my chest that my leg pain seems like a fucking hangnail.
What do I even say to that?
“What would be wrong with me and Lincoln?” I panic. “I’d be great for Lincoln.”
Reiss hesitates and then laughs, “That’s not even funny, man. I love you but we both know that Lincoln is difficult. You don’t do anything difficult. Plus, you and Lincoln hate each other half the time, so stop fucking with me.”
The fact that Reiss instantly thinks I’m joking kind of messes with my head because he’s right. Lincoln could do better. She should do better.
She’s all I’ve ever really wanted, but am I what she wants? Sure it may seem that way, but what about when it really comes down to it. Is she going to be happy with me?
My leg is fucked. There’s no chance of me going pro now. I have no back up plan. No support system.
“Colson?” Reiss says, pulling me out of my head. “Did you hear me?”
“Um, yeah… yeah. I was just messin’ with you.”
He blows out a sigh of relief. “Thank God. For a second, I thought you might be serious.”
“No,” I breathe. “Lincoln could do way better than me.”
I can see the tenseness fall right out of Reiss’ shoulders, “No one will ever be good enough for her but when she decides that someone is, I guess I won’t really have a say.”
“You’re right.” I agree. “No one will ever be good enough.”
His dark brows furrow like he sees right through me, but instead of continuing the conversation, he changes the subject entirely. It blows my chance to tell him that I’m in love with Lincoln. But hell, maybe I did that myself since I just lied straight to his face. Again.
I also lied about my injury. I wasn’t just resting my leg but, after working so hard to get to Nationals, it felt like all of that training went down the drain if I admitted that I wasn’t going to race.
A million scenarios float through my mind, too. What if I tough it out and race anyway? What if Lincoln losesinterest in me because I’m not racing anymore? Maybe I really am just not good enough?
My pain tolerance is pretty high, so for most people this injury would mean they couldn’t do it, but I’d been riding for months like this. What’s one more week of races?
“What is going through your head?” Reiss asks. “You look like you're fighting your own mind over there.”
“I was just thinking about Nationals,” I admit. “Hoping I don’t completely blow it.”
