Page 39 of Send It
“We kissed, Stas. At the lake house on my birthday.”
Her eyes widened, “You just kissed?”
“We swam together, naked.” I shrug.
She all but squeals, “Oh my God, Linc! That was two weeks ago and you are just now telling me?”
“It didn’t feel right to tell,” I shrug. “Reiss doesn’t know.”
Stassie’s brows pull together tightly, “Why was Colson an asshole to you earlier?”
“I don’t know,” I sigh. “When we’re alone everything is different, but when Reiss is around it’s like things used to be. I’m the little kid they can’t get rid of fast enough.”
“He’s afraid of Reiss’ reaction?” She questions.
“I guess,” I agree. “He’s afraid of everything. He’s so guarded and I don’t know what he’s thinking or how he really feels. Then toss in his injury flare up on top of that and the fact that he’s literally alone at home.”
“When are Brian and Kim coming back?” She asks.
I feel the anger bubbling up, “Who knows?”
“Are they coming to Nationals?”
I sigh, “I don’t know.”
“Do you really like him?” Stas asks, causing my face to twist. “Or do you like the idea of him?”
“What does that even mean?”
“Do you think maybe you want him so bad because you can’t have him? I mean, it’s exciting because he is Reiss’ friend. Do you think you’d still want him if he was just some guy at a party?”
I think about the words coming out of her mouth and the words start falling out of mine without even thinking. “For as long as I can remember it’s been Colson. I’ve never wanted anyone like I want him. I can date Jackson and be fine, Stassie, we would be happy and we would get along. It would be comfortable but he’d never be Colson. I don’t want what’s easy or what anyone else thinks is right for me. I want that fire that burns inside of me when Colson looks at me, Stas.”
“Oh no,” she sighs. “It’s worse than I thought.”
I quickly wipe away a stray tear that manages to escape, “It’s impossible.”
She hugs me, “Just take some time for yourself. If it’s meant to happen, y’all will find a way. Are you going to tell Reiss?”
I shrug, “I guess not. I don’t want to come between them. If Colson wants to find a way to be together, he will tell him.”
Stassie shakes her head in agreement, “I think that’s smart. Let him get his shit together and figure it out.”
“Get some rest,” she demands. “It’s not easy to be the two prettiest girls on the lake.”
“I don’t want to go,” I sigh.
Stas smiles, just before flicking off the lamp, “If you don’t go, how will Colson see all the Instagram photos you’re gonna post that scream he’s missing out.”
“If he even cares. He made it clear that he didn’t care what I did.”
Stassie laughs loudly, “Please, girl. That boy is so fucked when it comes to you. It’s so obvious that if Reiss doesn’t catch on soon, I’m gonna worry that your brother is actually stupid.”
“He must be,” I agree. “He still hasn’t caught on to you.”
“Don’t even go there. Reiss is hot. Super fucking hot but it’s a real turn off the way he sleeps around. I can’t get down with that.”
“He’s all talk and no action,” I laugh.
