Page 72 of The Surprise Play
It felt so freaking good to have an ally. To have him shout at that mean girl on my behalf.
But…
I’m happy on my own.
I keep trying to sell myself on that line for some reason. Tonight… it’s not holding as much power.
Pausing at the edge of the curb, I check the street for traffic before shuffling across the road and noticing a group of girls giggling together as they walk ahead of me,all talking at once.
They sound so happy.
So connected.
I’ve never had that.
I can’t imagine I ever will.
And something about that thought makes that ball in my stomach shrivel. It’s replaced with a heavy, aching feeling that I know all too well.
I keep trying to deny it, but as I walk home talking to my mother, reality hits like a power punch…
I’m lonely.
And I don’t know how to make any friends.
CHAPTER 21
WILY
We’ve had a night to sleep off our loss.
To say we all shuffled off to bed highly deflated was an understatement. Even I couldn’t rally the will to be positive.
I, Mr. Glass Half Full, went to bed utterly devastated.
I don’t know how the team slept.
I tossed and turned, woke up groggy and depressed.
Shuffling out to the bus with cameras clicking in our faces was an effort, but no harder than having to sit through those interviews after the game. It fucking sucked. We’ve all been coached on what to say and what to avoid, and the interviewers seem to love me because I know how to put on a smile, make a joke, even when I’m feeling like shit.
And I did—I performed the way I was supposed to, pretended like the loss was manageable.
But shit… I was gutted.
The bus ride to the airport was solemn, subdued.
The plane ride back to Nolan wasn’t much better.
And now we’re back in Colorado, heading to campus with only quiet murmurs happening around us. Grady’s got his headphones on and is staring out the window, Tyrell’s having a quiet chat with Zander, and Carson’s on his phone, texting… it’s gotta be Nylah. His lips keep twitching like he’s fighting a grin.
I frown and look away from him, gazing out the window at the familiar highway. How many times have we traveled this road back and forth to away games?
And that was my last one.
Shit.
My last game as a Nolan U Cougar.
