Page 131 of A Promise of Peridot
“Kane.” I leveled a glare at him.
“And there he goes,” Fedrik drawled. “Hostile and threatening once again.”
Griffin strode over to stand beside his king. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so aggressive, Fedrik. Didn’t get your beauty sleep?”
But it was Kane who loosed a dark and venomous chuckle. “He’s angry. He wants her and knows she’ll never be his.”
There was that predictable Kane cruelty. And to the very person we needed to vouch for him to Citrine. “Don’t talk about me like I’m not here.” I pulled Fedrik away from the prying eyes of the throne room by the arm. “Come on.”
Kane called to our backs, “Enjoy the soaked kingdom.”
“Is that the kind of brute you always imagined yourself with?” Fedrik asked as we passed Kane’s sentries and roamed out into the hall.
“Not particularly,” I admitted once we were alone.
“Let me show you a better life. Maybe not with me, but surely not with him.”
“Fedrik, I can’t come with you.”
“I’m not trying to sweep you off your feet, Arwen. But you haven’t even—”
“I’m in love with him.”
The quiet hall was already a reprieve from the teeming throne room, but there was a peaceful calm in my mind as well as soon as I spoke the words aloud.
A serene, steadfast resolve solidifying around that singular truth.
Of course I loved him.
I had been falling in love with Kane since the day we raced in the woods. Maybe even since he had given me his fox fur when I’d been so close to breaking. He never let me, though. Not then, not after Siren’s Bay, and not now.
Denying it for so long—it had been a cruelty to both him and myself. Saying the words—even to Fedrik—felt like walking through those enormous ornate doors to Shadowhold. It felt like coming home.
Fedrik’s brows knit inward. “I can’t say I’m happy for you two.”
“You don’t have to. I don’t think it would be fair to him to be together.”
“That’s a load. He’s utterly devoted to you.”
I said nothing. I understood his anger.
“If he made you think... He is such a fool.” Fedrik shook his head. “Always has been.”
I smiled weakly as a handful of soldiers with masks like skulls and sleek leather armor passed by us and into the bustling throne room. “What will you tell your parents?”
“Some version of the truth.”
“Which is?”
Fedrik’s face gave nothing away. “I’m not sure yet. Look, if you change your mind, I’m just a sea away.”
I nodded, and once he had strolled back into the throne room, I sagged against the cool stone wall.
Maybe Fedrik was right. Maybe we were both fools.
Was it not foolish to know we loved each other and not act on it? Not try to be together, in whatever way we could?
Or was it foolish to confess my love to Kane knowing I might be ripped from his grasp any day now? Knowing how many he’dalready lost. Remembering how pained he looked when he’d admitted his love...
