Page 30 of Ski You Later
Putting my phone away and taking a big breath, I prepare for the conversation we’re about to have.
“What. The hell.” My words are clipped, giving him the benefit of the doubt before I completely explode.
“You’re welcome,” he says automatically. His tone pleasant as he acts like he just did me a great favour.
“Are you joking?” I ask plainly.
My words cause him to turn, caution entering his tone as he responds. “Yes?” The question lacing that word only causes my frown to deepen.
“Do you know what you just did?” My voice rises on its own accord, and I quickly tamper it back down.
With his eyes covered by his goggles, all I can see is his mouth hanging slightly ajar. “What I just did? You mean save your ass?” He questions indignantly.
I can’t help but scoff, my body involuntarily brushing against his as I look back up to him. “Save me? If by that you mean,make my life a hundred times harder, then yes. You totally saved me, Roman.”
He stares at me in disbelief, my words sinking in as his face grows more outraged. His stare of silenceturns into an unbelieving chuckle, that quickly followed by a strangled sound.
“I. You. I just,” his words are clipped as he flounders for another minute. He takes a breath and tilts his head down to stare right at me.
“I thought I did what you wanted me to,” he says defensively. A touch of worry laces his words, but that only frustrates me further.
Putting both my hands on the bar, I drop my head into them and exhale an exasperated breath. “What are we going to do now?” I groan.
A hand lands on my shoulder, Roman’s gloved fingers giving it a slight squeeze as I look back up at him. His face looks pained, the humour from a moment ago vanishing as he looks down at his skis. “Look, I’m sorry, Rhodes.”
I sit up fully now. The way sincerity coats his every word has me more curious than anything else. “I had no idea what to do when you asked me for help last week. People don’t exactly come to me for help, and it took me by surprise, that’s all. I never wanted to disappoint you, and I thought we would talk it through some more. Then, before I could figure out what I wanted to say, you just ran out the door. I’ve felt like shit since then, and I didn’t know what to do.
“Today I planned to pull you aside and discuss this further. But, when I finished my run, and I saw your cousin being mean to you.” He looks away from me now, focusing on the ground below us. “After everything she’s done to you, there was no hesitation in my mind that I had to step in.”
The emotion lacing every one of his words shocks me beyond belief. This rare vulnerability from him invading each of his sentences, and my anger slowly disappears.
He’s totally right. I shouldn’t have just run off and been so caught up in my own emotions that I didn’t even think about him. It was clear that the night prior to our talk had rattled him, and then I just followed that up by asking for a massive favour.
Roman keeps talking, completely oblivious to my internal debate. “So, what I’m trying to say is, I’m sorry. I really thought I was helping.” His voice is dejected as he finishes speaking, and his tone conveys just how much frustration he has with himself.
I don’t know if it’s because I’m delusional or just crave rejection from him, but I reach over and grab Roman’s hand. He tenses underneath my touch but doesn’t pull away.
“I should be the one apologizing, not you. I’m so thankful you’re constantly trying to help me, and you continue to have my back. Frankly, I don’t even know why you’re being so nice, but you should know that I’m really grateful.” Giving his hand one more squeeze, I promptly release him.
He continues to stare down at the place my hand vacated. While he hasn’t spoken yet, there’s a relaxed quality to his face when he looks back up at me. Something close to a smile graces his stoic features.
“So, what should we do about this situation I got us in?” he asks matter-of-factly.
A humourless chuckle leaves my lips, and I lean my elbows on the safety bar in front of me.
“Well, I don’t know if there’s anything we can do at this point.” My words are resigned, and I try to keep my tone neutral as I tell him my plan. “I’ll come clean about everything. It’ll be easy for everyone to believe that you were just trying to help me. Then I can take the blame and deal with the consequences.”I see him quickly turn towards me, but I keep my gaze trained forward.
This whole situation is embarrassing enough to make my chest hurt, but I know without a doubt that I can’t let Roman sacrifice anymore for me.
Will I be teased by my friends and family for the foreseeable future? Probably. But that’s nothing a will of steel can’t handle.
Swinging my skis back and forth keeps my mind off the impending damage to my pride. I resign myself to this fate and brainstorm ways to handle it with grace.
Maybe if I moved to Mexico, people would forget about me completely.
It isn’t the perfect plan, but it’s also not the worst.
“Rhodes, in what world would I let you do that?” Roman says, somehow sounding angry and exasperated at the same time.
