Page 31 of A Labor of Hate
I scrambled out of bed, tying my robe around my pajamas.More to hide the fact that I wasn’t wearing a bra than because I was cold or ashamed of my pajamas.They were freaking cute, actually.Soft cotton pants with printed llamas wearing party hats and sleeping masks.And, yeah, the shirt said “Siesta Fiesta” with a large llama wearing a sombrero and clutching a pillow.So what?Shamelessly wearing puns on one’s clothing was the mark of a true adult.
I was halfway down the hall before I remembered my belly.Believe me, not a thought I ever anticipated myself having if you’d have asked me two weeks ago, but here we were.I stumbled in my haste to retrieve the offending item as more knocking pounded on the door.
Seriously, what was this person’s deal?Just because we were home didn’t mean we wanted to open the door at seven-freaking-twenty in the morning.
“I’m coming!”I called, just in time to trip on the threshold to the bedroom.I hit my knees on the ground with a painful thud, which only worsened my mood as I shot back up and frantically strapped the belly on under my precious llama shirt.The shirt which barely stretched over the stomach, but that’s what the robe was for, right?
I tugged it tighter, practically jogging to the door.At least whoever it was had stopped knocking.Finally—finally—I pulled the door open, a touch breathless from my mad scramble.My growl died in my throat as I caught sight of the elderly faces smiling back at me.
“Ooh, I heard our new neighbor was expecting!Good morning, dear.I’m Colleen” —the woman thrust a pound cake at me and inclined her head at the elderly gentleman beside her— “and this is my husband, Joseph.”
“Uh” —I slowly took the pound cake, my residual grogginess rendering me oh-so-eloquent— “hi.”
Apparently that was enough for Colleen.Her face lit up like the Fourth of July.“My, Liamsaidyou were pretty, but he didn’t do you nearly enough justice.”
My brain moved in slow motion.Liam the lumberjack guy?Had he gone door-to-door announcing our arrival to the neighborhood or something?
She nudged her husband.“I’ve never seen eyes so green, have you, Joseph?”
Joseph, the more reserved of the two, had the good grace to blush—and avoid answering his wife’s question.“So sorry for the early intrusion.We wanted to welcome you to the neighborhood and figured you’d be leaving for work soon.”He took in my bedraggled appearance with a cringe.“Though it appears we caught you on your day off.Our apologies.”
I looked down at the pajamas and robe, maneuvering the pound cake to the side.Yeah, not my best look.And I didn’t even want tothinkabout what my hair looked like.On a good day, it was like Hagrid with the faintest aftertaste of Maybelline.Right after waking up?Probably offensive enough to get canceled on Twitter-X.
Was it just me, or was the belly bigger today?It definitely looked different.Rounder and higher…
Oh.
Oh no.
I quickly returned the pound cake to block some of my midsection, discreetly pulling the robe around to cover the belly better.In my scramble to open the door, I’d somehow managed to put the belly on upside down.
Yup.I wish I was kidding.But no.This was painfully, horribly real.
“Oh, no need to be bashful, dear,” Colleen assured.“It’s nothing we haven’t seen before.”
Something told me she wasn’t talking about the llamas.I pulled the robe to cover my chest better, too.I needed a bigger robe.Or maybe a wearable tent.That sounded good.
Joseph cleared his throat.“We’re Liam’s parents.He mentioned something about having you and your husband over for dinner.But no rush.”A wide smile cracked across his wrinkled face.“That’s what the pound cake is for—to tide you over until we can feed you properly.”
“It’s a raspberry lemon loaf.”Colleen beamed with pride.“Is your husband home?”
“Uh.”Wow, I wasreallykilling it in the conversation department today.“He’s in the basement.But I can get him if you’d like to meet him?”
If I had to socialize at unholy hours of the morning, so did Colt, dang it.And, this would give me a chance to turn my belly around.Win-win.
“Oh, no, that’s fi—” Joseph began.
“Yes, please!”Colleen cut him off.“Liam didn’t tell us much about him, so I’d like to see what man landed you.”
Ha!If only she knew the half of it.Not that I looked like a catch for anyone besides a Bigfoot hunter right now, but it was kind of her to think otherwise.
“In that case, come on in.”I gestured to the couch in the living room.“Have a seat and I’ll go get him.”
I didn't even stop to put the pound cake in the kitchen.Nope, this thing was in it for the long haul right along with me.Consider it a shield of delicious, sugary goodness to help conceal my blunder.
Thankfully, Colleen didn’t try to follow.I didn’t know what to expect next from her but finding her trailing behind wouldn’t have surprised me much.
I burst into the workout room, only to stop short.Colt paused in the middle of his pull-up, his long, muscled,shirtlesstorso tensed and sweaty.I’m not proud to admit it, but I stared.And maybe my mouth got a little dry.I will neither confirm nor deny.But when your brain was still addled by sleep and a sculpted, freckled torso was on display in front of you, all shiny and hotter than anything associated with Colt had any business being, your common sense took a minute to catch up, okay?
