Page 61 of A Labor of Hate
I blinked.Once.Twice.Three times before any words would come out.I didn’t deserve her thanks.“I’m not exactly qualified to give any advice, anyway.Colt and I were one of the lucky ones.And you’re right.Itisn’tfair.”
None of it was, really.That a ray of sunshine like her had gone through so much, and would inevitably go through much more soon.That surprise pregnancies happened all the time but seemingly never to those who prayed the hardest for it.That some people were blessed with miracle babies like Charles and Vivienne eventually were, and some people… weren’t.Ever.And that, to save so many others, I had to sit next to her—someone baring her soul and experience with infertility—while faking a pregnancy and lying to her face.
It felt like sacrilege.Desecration.
A mockery.
“I’m really glad I met you,” Vivienne murmured, her smile softening even as her words cracked my empty chest cavity a little more.“And I’m really glad you came with me today.”Another painful fissure spread inside me as she nodded toward the lounge chairs behind us.“How about we dry off a bit and call it a day?”
I smiled, feeling like I was commandeering a puppet rather than my own body.“That sounds great.The sooner I can get out of this crime against humanity, the better.”
I discreetly held my stomach in place as we made our way to the chairs, the pool water blessedly suctioning it to my skin.Still, the band across my back loosened a touch more.
We lounged until our suits dried, soaking in the sun streaming in from the overhead skylights.I beat away my guilt the whole time.And when she mentioned how Charles was currently painting the nursery and setting up a secure baby monitor, I reminded myself of all the heinous things he’d done, the real reason I was here.No matter his reasons, no matter how much he loved his wife and unborn child, none of it would undo what he’d done.I couldn’t—wouldn’t— let it interfere with the assignment.
Since we’d already made our way through all of the spa’s activities that were part of the package deal, once our suits dried, we heaved ourselves out of the chairs to return to the lockers.This would’ve gone down without a hitch, if my belly hadn’t decided to jump ship.
Blood drained from my face as the silicone mass slid downward, dangerously close to cradling my hips.I pulled my towel to hide my migrating abdomen, frantically looking for a solution.It was already too low to hold discreetly.I’d left my robe in the locker room, since Vivienne hadn’t brought hers.Stupid.Rookie mistake.The towel could only hide so much once we got moving, and I’d have to ditch it in the locker room, anyway.
Vivienne waited for me, watching curiously as I stood in place.
I flashed her a smile and pointed at a plant in a pot behind her.“Hey, what kind of plant do you think that is?”
I didn’t delay.As soon as she turned, I wrapped both hands under the belly and yanked that sucker up.A horrible squelching sound reverberated throughout the entire pool room as the belly de-suctioned from my hips and re-suctioned to my real stomach.A dozen pairs of eyes turned to look at me.
I froze.How did I explain myself out of this one?Pretend I didn’t notice the unholy noise that everyone within a mile radius had heard?Pretend I had a plunger hiding under my towel?
All rational thought seemed to abandon me.I ground my teeth together, my already red face darkening to crimson.“Uh… Sorry.Indigestion.”
Maybe if I’d eaten a live kraken and force-fed it Taco Bell beforehand, my pitiful explanation could’ve made it into the realm of believability.But nope.Normal, healthy humans should never,evermake whatever sound my belly had just made.
Vivienne stared for another moment before breaking into a fit of laughter.Her face flushed as she struggled for air, wiping at her makeup-free eyes.“That was” —another peal of laughter— “the best” —a gasping breath— “thing I’ve ever” —a belly-shaking giggle— “ever heard.”
By the time she finally regained enough composure to be coherent, I was already halfway to the lockers.I’d thrown all caution to the wind concerning keeping my belly in place and looking natural.After that otherworldly sound effect that for all intents and purposes appeared to originate from my body, nothing I could do now could embarrass me more.So I speed-waddled with one hand supporting the bottom of my belly and the other holding the towel to cover my eyesore of a swimsuit.
Vivienne breathed out a gust of air once she caught up to me, as if that would help stave off the giggles.“You just made my whole day right there.”
“I’m pretty sure I just became a cautionary tale mothers will tell their children at night to get them to go to sleep.”
“Ooh, good idea!I can start the tradition with my baby.”
I sent her a look to let her know just how much I appreciated her thoughtful offer.
She fought a smile and waggled a finger to encompass my midsection.“I imagine you’ll be a little…tied up… in the bathroom for a while, so I’ll leave you to it.See you in class Thursday!”
I returned her goodbye, any pride I might have had left shriveling up and dying a slow, painful death.At least spa day was over.I’d survived.
The worst parts were already over.
CHAPTERTWENTY
ON THE LISTof famous last words, I may as well add “the worst parts were already over.”One might see me in my current predicament and wonder how someone intelligent enough to hack it in my career possibly could’ve ended up here.Like this.And the answer was simple, really.
Even smart people could be unbelievably stupid when their pride was on the line.
In my defense, it had seemed like a genius idea at the time.After returning to the lockers at the spa, I’d found all of my clothes slimy and wet from the half a bottle of miracle hair serum that had tipped over and spilled.I could either suck it up and wear the clothes anyway, getting my body and car seats slimy and sticky in the process, too, or keep the hideous swimsuit on.I’d chosen the latter.
When I’d made it home, Colleen had been in her front yard, weeding her flowerbed.She’d waved at me as I’d pulled in the driveway, already making her way toward me for a friendly chat I had no desire to have, and especially not while in my swimwear.I wasn’t proud of it, but I’d run the second my keys left the ignition.
