Page 50 of Where Are You Now
Consideration crossed his face.
“Say yes.”
He looked at her. “I suppose I could do with a little prayer and group contemplation.”
She smiled.
They walked up to the structure. Ava climbed the steps and ran her fingers over the layers of thick paint covering the double doors. It still had the old skeleton keyhole and ornate brass knob, discolored from the elements. She tried to cup her hand and see through the stained-glass window, but the view was skewed by the wavy panes.
“I wonder who we’ll see tomorrow. Who goes to this church?” she asked, turning around and taking a seat on the steps.
“No idea. There isn’t a house in sight.” He sat down beside her. “Think we should be drinking wine on its steps?”
“Jesus drank wine,” she pointed out.
“True.” He tipped his glass to his lips and took a drink.
She nodded over to the sign. “Their services are at eight and ten tomorrow.”
“Should I pick you up at around nine forty-five then?”
“That sounds perfect.”
Chapter Sixteen
The next morning, Ava had been up before the sun, restless, so around 6:00 a.m. she’d made herself a cup of coffee and went into the office. She checked her calendar. She’d be returning to work just over a week from now. She’d better get caught up and ease herself back into the swing of things.
But she proceeded with a new perspective. During her near-death experience, God could have judged her right there on the spot, and if she was ever allowed into heaven, she might still face that. But he’d said nothing about her complete lack of compassion or her limited service to others. Instead, he’d wrapped her in love and let her choose her fate.
Yesterday, when she’d taken a walk with Lucas, she’d felt his kindness, and his presence alone made her feel that same kind of love. So as she logged on, Ava channeled that feeling and approached her job in a whole new way.
The first thing she did was send Scott Strobel an email of congratulations and let him know that she planned to come back to New York next weekend, and return to the office on the Monday. At one time, she’d have been hard pressed toformulate even a single phrase of well wishes to the man whom, for so long, had felt like the enemy. He’d been the one in the way of her dreams. But now, without the weight of competition, Ava felt the need to unite under a common goal and to do her best to fulfill her duties so she could find ways to create the dynamic atmosphere she had been hoping to build as partner.
The buzz of the city would be nice. Eventually, she’d have to get back to life as usual.
While she sipped her morning coffee, she scrolled through her emails, answering a few from people who’d sent her notes of concern after her accident. She opened one from Rachel Bronson that included a paragraph about how worried she’d been.
… They said your car was unrecognizable. It’s a wonder anyone lived at all.
Ava replied, thanking her for calling 911. She then filled in Rachel on how well she was recovering, and told her she’d be back next week.
Ava wasn’t quite sure how she was going to tell her mother yet. She didn’t like the idea of leaving her mom alone again. She couldn’t stay at the lake forever. She was healing surprisingly well, so there was no need to prolong her return to New York.
It really was miraculous how quickly she’d improved.
Miraculous.
Why had she been given a choice to come back in the first place? Was there something else she needed to learn, more work she had to do? The voice had been so strong at the beginning of her ordeal, but Ava hadn’t received a thing since that moment when she’d heard she wasn’t finished. Was the voice quiet because she was on the right path? Or because she’d held up her end of the bargain? What had she finished?
The problem was that she’d chosen to live toget back to her work, but now nothing was the same. She still wasn’t entirely sure what her dreams were anymore. The trajectory of her future wasn’t laid out before her now.
In college, she’d filled every free minute with internships and extracurricular training; she attended conferences, and passed out business cards with her skills and assets. She made cold calls and asked prospective employers to have coffee or spare a few minutes to meet on the sidewalk, if that was what it took. Before she’d even left college, she’d had a string of interviews set up. She’d graduated on a Friday and walked into McGregor Creative the next Monday. She’d meticulously laid out her steps. But after everything that had happened, she was in unchartered territory.
Now, Ava would choose spending the morning with Lucas in a little white church in the middle of nowhere over checking her emails. What had happened to the all-powerful Ava St. John who’d do anything to achieve her goals? That Ava felt like a distant memory, and she found herself scrambling to grab hold of that version of her because without it, she wasn’t sure who she was.
She couldn’t lose this job. Competition was fierce in her line of work, and positions like hers were few and far-between for someone her age.
A ping alerted her to Scott Strobel’s response. She opened it. Scott thanked her and told her he planned to restructure the department, and she’d work directly under him as his “right-hand person.” He said he looked forward to her “fresh perspective.” Did he?
