Page 13 of Sexy AF
Seven
Benny
Ifinally had Carrie in my house. As I walked to my room alone, it felt wrong that she was not by my side. My muscles were tight and hard. I stripped and did sit-ups, as working out usually calmed my nerves.
Carrie was the only woman I’d ever met who mattered, and I was a fuckhead who had left her and then not admitted to either of us how I’d felt. I wanted to worship her.
I finished the sit-ups and moved on to weights in my gym. Hard physical work usually blocked my thoughts, but no matter how much I sweated, I still tasted Carrie. The moon was high in the sky as I finished my routine, but my mind still pictured my new wife alone in the bedroom down the hall.
I took a shower in my gym, and as I wrapped myself in a towel, my phone rang. I saw my brother’s number on the screen. He lived in Pittsburgh, which was three hours later than California. “Johnny, I didn’t expect you to call.”
“Congrats,” Johnny said quickly. I heard car sounds, which meant he must have left the hospital late. “I figured I’d leave a message, but I’m happy you finally got around to tell Carrie you were in love with her.”
Love.The word struck me like a slap across my damn face. I massaged my cheek. “I… is that what you think?”
“You’ve compared every woman to her since we were children. I hope you remember to live the opposite way our parents did if you want a happy marriage.”
Fuck me.He knew my heart better than I did. I headed out of the gym to my bedroom. “Are you happy?”
“Bradley and Olivia are my life. Olivia teaches me every day what love is and how a man acts when he’s in love.”
Unlike my brother, who’d left California and never returned, I’d stayed and listened to my parents’ silence, which was more deafening than screams. Love wasn’t something Dawes men understood. I glanced at Carrie’s door as I headed into my room. “How’s that?”
“Respect and communication, little brother, are the key to everything.”
“Thanks.” My heart was pounding again and not because of the workout.
I focused on the wordlove. I was seriously fucked-up, and Johnny was right. I loved Carrie, and if she was happy with me, I’d be happy too. Somehow, I needed to make up for ten stupid years of ignoring the only woman I’d ever loved. I was a fool.
I turned to go into her room to tell her, but I stopped. She’d been clear, and step one of starting to make things right meant respecting her. However, in the morning, we needed to start over right. I’d think of how to win her heart.
For the moment, I decided to take care of some small details. I picked up the phone and called Carrie’s sister. She answered on the first ring, and I wasted no time as I said, “Isabella, it’s late. Sorry, but I’m hoping you can help me. Your sister doesn’t have many things, and she’s not into jewelry, but she’ll need some for a few events. Can you pick up some jewelry from your job tomorrow and bring it over for her? I’ll give you my credit card.”
“Amazing. I’m on it.” She talked about how Carrie was a sweet sister who never asked for anything. As she jabbered, I heard a distinct scream coming from down the hall.
I quickly said, “I have to go.” Then I bolted out of my bedroom and barged into Carrie’s.
She was lying on the bed, and I hurried over to her. I sat down and pushed her hair out of her face. She must have been sleeping. “Carrie, are you okay?”
Her eyelids batted, and my heart opened. Then she hugged me. “Benny. I still see what happened.”
I held her tight. I’d been twelve. I saw her racing toward her dad when some guys in a blue car sped toward him, and then there was a loud pop. I jumped onto the street and pulled her into me. She’d been screaming then too.
Carrie cried.
I said, “You’re okay now. I’m glad I was there.”
She laughed and sat up. “Me too. You became my hero. I worshiped you from that moment on.”
I kissed her forehead, wishing I were a better man instead of a screwup. “I’m not a hero.”
She wiped her eyes and let out a sigh. “I figured that out, but when I needed you, in that second, you were there.”
I’d known she would be okay when Maria Maragani said she would take care of her. After that, I walked Carrie to and from school, like she was mine, until I went to college. My parents had pushed me into university and then law school, saying love was a joke. Maybe Johnny was right, and I’d been an idiot for listening to the unhappiest people I’d ever met.
Carrie yawned. My body wanted to hold her. Instead, I said, “I’ve always wanted to be close to you, so that made it easy. But I see you’re tired. Get some rest.” I stood up, my body tense. It hurt to leave her. I hoped she would call me back.
As I made it across the room, she called out, “Benny?”
I stopped and turned. “Yeah?”
She smiled. “Good night.”
That little dream wasn’t going to be real. I opened the door but pointed behind me. “You too. If you need me, I’m right across the hall.”
She curled back into her bed, and I closed the door. For the rest of my life, I would protect her and not have to hide my interest in her anymore. She was my wife, my life, and the woman I loved. It was time to put her first.
