Page 32 of Rocking Player
I forgot my son was watching when Michael claimed his kiss. Goosebumps grew on my arms, and I ran my fingers through his hair.
This was a sweet moment, and I hardly heard my son’s groan or the gondola driver’s singing.
I belonged to Michael, forever.
No tears, not now. I needed to be calm and this wasn’t it.
Back in the Bahamas, I’d imagined him as my husband, but that dream had disappeared, until now, as his kiss ended.
Now the dream was visceral and staring me in the face. And my gaze got misty.
A memory came of sitting at my mom’s funeral, where my sisters, cousins, and I all swore that love and happily-ever-after were lies that we’d never believe again. Everyone agreed, and I’d sworn with my sisters to never love any man so much that I’d want to stop living if something happened to him. My cousins probably had other reasons for agreeing, as it had been my dad that took them in at some point in our lives.
All of us had made a pact. Stephanie broke the bond first when she announced she was getting married.
The tension in my back, like I had betrayed my sisters, made my face heat.
And Michael, maybe he didn’t count, because I’d been with him before the vow and our wedding wasn’t about love. It was about keeping Jeremy’s future secure, forever.
The gondola docked and he held my hand and helped me get off the boat as I wiped my eyes and said, “This was beautiful.”
He had his hand on my back and Jeremy’s to lead us through a small walkway as he said, “Don’t cry. We have lunch.”
Tears came out, like marrying Michael was wonderful, and I said, “Don’t comfort me. You don’t make me calm at all and I’ll cry more.”
I don’t even know why, and I couldn’t analyze it. The staff directed us to follow them to a room. He massaged me and said, “Let’s change fast.”
We were brought to a hotel room where our clothes were bagged up, and boxes were laid out. Jeremy picked up his and said, “Mom, Michael bought me a new outfit.”
Like he’d done for me, too. The dress hadn’t been cheap, not that any wedding dress was. But I let Michael unzip me and my spine had a zap of awareness as Jeremy said, “My aunts and uncles all agree you were beautiful.”
My son’s voice was like cold water tossed in my face as I asked, “You told them?”
Jeremy’s eyes widened and said, “I took a video and put it in the group chat.”
My heart clenched. Everyone knowing was like little stabs in my heart.
I couldn’t breathe.
I tried to remind myself that peace came from within, right? I’d never let Jeremy know he'd hurt me. I'd never be like my mom.
I hung the dress on a hanger and zipped it in the bag as Michael said, “We can stream the whole thing, so you can share the high def video.”
I’d call tomorrow in the group chat as I’d planned, though Jeremy had already told them with one video. I nodded at him and said, “Okay. I’ll call them later.”
Jeremy and Michael were dressed, and I was still in my white slip.
I finished packing the dress and went for the package as Michael said, “Time is speeding up. Right now, we have a flight to Tulsa as I have a game tonight.”
Time flew. I opened the white cotton dress and said, “I’ll finish fast. We can skip lunch as I’m not hungry.”
He confirmed something on his phone as it beeped and he said, “No problem.”
I took my pins out of my hair and let my hair fall behind my ears and neck. Then I gave them both a thumbs-up and said, “Done.”
He kissed my palm as he directed us out of the room and said, “Sorry about the speed of the day.”
We ran toward the limo where the driver already loaded our bags, as I said, “It’s fun to have all these places to be.”
