Page 73 of Rift
“She was warning me,” Astra said, leaning closer toward him, the heat from his skin buzzing in the space between their hands. “About you.”
His shoulders tensed, something flashing across his eyes—maybe anger, maybe fear, it was always impossible to tell with him.
“What about me?”
“She suspects you to be a spy,” Astra said, choosing her words carefully.
His lips twitched and he turned toward her, holding the embers in her eyes. “A spy?”
“For the Solar Court.”
Luxuros did not flinch like she thought he might. Instead, he blinked slowly. The corner of his mouth slipped upward into an amused grin.
“What’s funny?” Astra asked, sinking back into herself.
He broke into a deep laugh, the sound bouncing off her shoulders as he closed his eyes. “She remarked how warm I was after all that hatchling nonsense. If she’d ever met a full-blooded Solarian she’d know just how wrong she is.” He shook his head, seeing the concern in Astra’s eyes. “We’ve gone over this, As. I’m not lying to you. I may have Solarian blood but I’ve no Solarian loyalty. I’ve never met a Solar courtier, certainly not the king.”
“That you know of,” Astra corrected him. “What if you were a Solarian spy and have no memory of it? You go on and on about my lack of discipline, but what about your fear of who you might be, Commander? You’re so afraid to touch any of it, you don’t know where your loyalties may truly lie.”
He moved closer, an anger she seldom saw rising in him as he prepared to argue with her, but the damned truth of it all was that she was right.
Devastatingly so.
“You really remember nothing?”
Luxuros tried to turn his attention back to the book, but she was so close he could smell the moonblossom petal scent of her perfume. Something about it disarmed his ironclad will as he chewed on the inside of his cheek.
“I’m overstepping. I apologize.”
“No,” he said. “It’s okay. You have every right to be concerned. I realize we’re asking a lot of you to just take me at my word. I am sincere when I say I have nearly no memories, Astra. Sometimes I dream of a library in Solaris, I think. Everything is so warm and brightly lit it couldn’t be anywhere else. I’m usually playing a marble game of sorts, with these little glass orbs that clink together when they cross paths. That’s one of the good memories.” Luxuros paused, closing his amber eyes to try and recall things he’d worked hard to erase.
“I have nightmares of The Flare frequently,” he continued. “It’s nothing concrete, just an intense fear as I float. I was only a child when it happened, As. We don’t think I’d started my primary schooling yet. When I showed up at the Mercurian Gate, I only remembered my name and enough languages to piece together that I was at least partially Solarian. I spoke the common tongue, but Mirquios’s father had a palace tutor run me through every dialect they knew of and identified that I was fluent in Solar Elvish and several regional Jovian dialects. We think perhaps one of my parents was a Jovian ambassador. But that’s as far as we ever got. I doubt I was a spy, given how young I was, but I’ve often worried who my parents are. Were,” he added.
Astra reached forward and rested her hand above the bandages on his forearm.
“I’m so sorry, Luxuros. That must be incredibly difficult to not know about your family.”
“When I was younger, sure. But I’ve lived a lot of life since then. I know who I am, even if I’ll never know who I was. There’s freedom in that.”
“I could help you,” Astra offered. “I have more tricks up my sleeve than just fire and fury.”
“Is that so?” He laughed, leaning into her touch before remembering himself and moving back.
She wiggled her fingers between them. “I haven’t practiced appropriately, but Lunarian women used to access all sorts of strange planes. It’s how I found you in the woods. Perhaps we could help you remember.”
“No need to waste your energy on me,” Luxuros said. “We have bigger things to worry about.”
Astra giggled. “The mighty commander fears nothing but himself.”
“Not nothing,” he sighed, his eyes falling over her. “You scare me.”
“Good.” She grinned. “I have one more question for you. Did you… did you train him on me?”
“Who?”
“Mirquios,” Astra said, her voice dropping to conceal the emotion building behind her words. “Everything was just so easy. Too easy. Did you craft it all to win me over?”
“No,” Luxuros assured her. “Of course not. We came with intentions to court you, but I swear to you, it was all him. Your mother may have passed along a few notes?—”
