Page 145 of Storm of Bells
The poor vicar’s legs gave out from underhim.
‘Come on, Vicar!’ Grabbing him by the arm,Adaira pulled him up, and Ella grabbed the other side withconsiderably more gentleness. ‘Let’s go do some good deeds.’
‘And kick some pimp arse!’ Amy added.
The poor reverend shook his head. ‘I must bedreaming. I must have fallen asleep in the curricle on the way tothe manor and must be having a nightmare.’
‘Don’t you worry.’ Patsy patted his hand.‘We’ll protect you, too.’
‘And we,’ Amy purred, sidling up behind Karimwith a wicked grin, ‘will protectye.’
Making a desperate noise, Karim tried toevade to the left—only to have his other arm be grabbed by Jenny.‘Indeed we will.’
Patting the squirming bodyguard on the back,I pushed open the door, revealing the way to the village.
‘Let’s go do some charity, shall we?’
TheHousewife
We didn’t take the mainpath down to the village. Instead, we took a small side path alongthe edge of a small clump of trees I hadn’t seen before. Beyond thetrees stretched wide, open fields, and dotted among the fields werea number of strange heaps of dirt. Smoke was rising from some ofthem.
‘What are those?’ I asked, pointing to themisshapen dirt piles.
The vicar blinked at me, confused. ‘Err…well,I said I was going to take you to Lord Ambrose’s tenants, did Inot?’
It took a moment for the meaning of his wordsto sink in. ‘Wait a second. Those arehouses?’
‘Holy Moly.’ Amy whistled. ‘I’ve stayed insome seriously shady places, but dis…dis takes the cake.’
‘No,’ I corrected. ‘The mouldy bread. I doubtanyone around here could afford cake.’
It didn’t take us long to reach the firstdwelling. Throwing a glance at Karim, the vicar cleared his throat.‘Ladies and gentlemen, would you be so kind as to stay back alittle? Some of you look a little, um…intimidating.’
Patsy nodded, looking pleased. ‘Certainly.I’ll stay out of sight. You, big bearded fellow! Move up to thefront, will you?’
Turning back to the thing which, in spite ofall evidence to the contrary, apparently was a house, the vicarknocked on the door. I could have sworn the whole buildingwobbled.
There were a few moments of silence—thenfootsteps approached from inside, and the door opened a crack.
‘Y-yes?’
‘It’s me,’ the reverend said, leaning forwardwith a reassuring smile. The door opened a bit wider. ‘I’ve broughtsome visitors from the manor.’
The door slammed shut, hard and fast. Franticshuffling came from inside. It sounded as if a whole family wastrying to hide under one three-legged stool.
‘It’s not Lord Ambrose!’ the vicar calledover the noise.
The shuffling ceased.
A few moments, footsteps approached again,more hesitant than before. A crack appeared in the door.
‘A-are you sure?’
‘Pretty sure.’ Sticking my head into thecrack beside the vicar’s, I sent a smile at the one eye that wasvisible through the opening. ‘Unless I’ve grown some extra partssince last I checked.’
‘M-my Lady! Vicar! You should have saidthere’s a lady outside!’
‘There isn’t, actually,’ I corrected.
