Page 75 of My Undead Heart
What is wrong with me?I apparently have less self-control than a zombie on the hunt for fresh meat. Last night I went to the gym determined to keep things casual. That or call the whole thing off, but instead ... Instead, I allowed Matt to pleasure me with his mouth until I came a record breaking number of times before he sank inside and fucked me right there in the middle of his gym.
Again.What is wrong with me?
I’m pondering this very troubling thought as I sit at my desk and try to make my way through a mountain of code before it’s time to break for lunch. A quick glance at the screen tells me that’s still hours away. My cell buzzes from the top of my desk and I readily swipe it off the surface, thankful for a momentary reprieve.Shit.How does he know I’m thinking about him?
Matt: Lunch Saturday? You have time?
Do I have time?Of course I have the time, and even if I didn’t I’d make it work for him. That’s the thought that has my stomach coiling into a thousand knots. When did this happen? I wasn’t going to bethat girl. The one who gets a little thrill every time her man invites her out. Not that Matt’s my man.Fuck!Even my brain can’t keep that straight. This is already a horrible cluster fuck. I should text him and say no, thank you. Cut things off now while I still can. Before hurt feelings and disappointments are involved.
As if they aren’t already.
Matt: It doesn’t have to be a date. Unless you want it to be.
That right there has my fingers frozen and unable to reply with a witty response. Is he being funny or making fun of me? I don’t know why I have an impulsive need to clarify when we’re on one of those stupid bet dates and when we’re not. I just do. Is this his way of letting me know he’d rather let our relationship devolve into a string of booty calls, or is he really letting me call the shots? I growl, a full on frustrated groan, because this ... This right here is exactly why I don’t know how to function in a relationship.
“Why are you trying to murder your phone, Kitten?”
Jared’s voice scares the crap out of me and I almost drop my cell when I swing my chair around to meet his stare over the low wall of our shared office. His lips pull into a wicked smile as he waits for my reply.
“I don’t know what you mean.” I flip my phone over, screen down, and cross my arms over my chest.
Jared only laughs. “Oh, Kitten, what did you do now?”
“Nothing. Why doIhave to do something? Why can’t it be him?”
“Hey, I’m on your team. Of course it can be him, but I need deets. Let’s coffee?”
“Now you’re talking. Yes!” I grab my wallet and jacket because as much as Jared drives me crazy with his shoddy advice, I need to unload on him. He’s my longest standing friend and he understands my crazy. He also understands why I am the way I am. I consider leaving my cell at my desk but grab it at the last minute.
“The Bean or Xpresso’s?” he asks. They’re our two go-to spots.
“Xpresso’s. I could use the walk.” I press the down button when we reach the elevator bank and tap my heel against the floor.Does this thing always take so long?
“I’m sorry, where is my Mia and what did you do with her?” Jared’s wide eyes are framed by his raised brows.
“What?” I demand, totally annoyed that he can tell there’s something wrong without asking.
“Opting for additional exercise to get to coffee? Matt’s influence, I assume.”
“You know what they say about people who assume,” I snap before the elevator opens and we step inside the car. It’s mostly empty. With my coat draped over one arm, I tuck my wallet under the other and hold my cell with a free hand. I glance at the screen. That damn text message still waits for my reply. Taunts my indecision.
The elevator pauses to pick up a few more passengers and my gaze lifts from my phone to find none other than Matt Haywood’s damn gorgeous smile.Fuck me. Worried for a second that I muttered that aloud, I realize it must have been Jared’s voice giving voice to my inappropriate thoughts. My body zings with the X-rated memories of last night’s training session. It takes every bit of self-control to not react when Matt shuffles closer inside.
“Hey, Mia, fancy meeting you here,” he says with that adorable lift of his lips.
“Hey, yeah.” Those are the words that leave my mouth, making me sound every bit the fool I feel.
He reaches forward just enough to brush his fingers along my hip and it’s all I can do to act unaffected when really I have a sudden need to ditch my coffee date for a quickie with my trainer. Matt’s eyes bounce between myself and Jared a few times and when I don’t say anything he reaches his hand out. “I’m Matt. We haven’t been formally introduced.”
“Oh, I know who you are.” Jared meets Matt’s handshake, his smile growing wide until he glances at me. “I’m Jared, Mia’s best friend.”
“For now,” I grumble.
“Nice to meet you. Digging the new color, by the way,” Matt says in reference to Jared’s change of hair. What was once electric blue is now flamingo pink.
“Oh yeah, Mia and I both like to change it up with the weather, but I’m awfully fond of her current red. What do you think, Matt?”
“What does he think?” I say more to Jared than Matt. I can’t believe the nerve. He knows better than to meddle when it comes to my relationships, and yet here he is asking Matt’s opinion on my hair color.
