Page 35 of Incubus
“I’m not attracted to him!” Nathan spat, a little louder than he intended. “He's just messing with my head.”
“Regardless,” Walter went on, “while I am glad you spared him, because he is a good man and I do believe he might be able to help save you from the fate you have chosen, there are still complications ahead. The path you choose now—”
“You know what,” Nathan broke in again, “why don’t you just tell me which path to choose so we can stop having this conversation. Why does it even matter what path I’m on, huh? I’m just me. Just Nathan. Nobody special. You act like my life is so damn important.”
“Of course your life is important,” Walter said. “Every life is. There are too many lines of probability to know which path is right, Nathan. It isn’t about one right answer, only easier and more difficult ways to reach one of several possible ends. I simply want you safe, on as right a path as is possible. I want you—”
"What? Boring and obedient?" Nathan grumbled.
"Happy."
Nathan could only stare back at Walter. His Spirit Guide’s warm brown eyes glowed surreally. Just like Sasha's blue ones.
"Whatever happiness you choose, I will be here,” Walter said. “I only wish for you to understand that few paths ahead of you will be easy. I can only help you so much on this journey, but when you need me, Nathan…all you have to do is call for me."
Nathan felt remarkably alone when Walter faded away, no longer visibly leaning against the sink so that all Nathan could see was himself reflected back.
Walterwasthere. Walter was always there. Nathan could call him back right that moment if he wanted. He used to call for Walter all the time when he was younger, those first few years alone with Jim.
For several moments Nathan just stared in the mirror, unconsciously clutching at his shirt where his scar was hidden beneath the fabric. When he finally left the bathroom, his mind wasn’t really focused on where he was going, until he slipped out the side exit into the cold. The exit lead into an alleyway, complete with dumpster, various types of grime, and not a single other soul in sight. Nathan enjoyed the seclusion, even if Walter was hovering somewhere nearby, and despite the chill in the air. He leaned back against the wall beside the door and sighed out a thick puff of visible breath.
He was startled when the door opened only a few moments later.
"Nathan?" came Sasha's voice, filled with concern. The incubus appeared as the door closed, revealing Nathan beside the dumpster. Sasha's red brows furrowed. "I thought I saw you head out here. Is everything okay?"
As Sasha drew closer, Nathan felt suddenly suffocated by the close quarters of the alleyway. The smell of Sasha that hadmanaged to remain unsoiled by the smell of alcohol wafted around him. "I'm...fine," Nathan said. "Just a lot on my mind."
"I can imagine." Sasha remained standing close in front of Nathan, his breath forming the same white puffs, though he didn't look nearly as susceptible to the cold without a jacket. He smiled warmly. "I'd apologize for being so...well, likeme, but you're difficult to read. I didn't mean to spook you back there."
Nathan shifted uncomfortably against the wall of the building.
"Listen...about that guy this morning—"
“Not my business,” Nathan said quickly. The last thing he wanted right now was an explanation, or, God forbid, an apology. “Assuming should be a cardinal sin. I shouldn’t have…yeah. So let’s just forget it, huh? Sleep with chicks, sleep with guys; it doesn't matter to me.”
Sasha frowned. “Nathan, it freaked you out. I’m not an idiot. I think it bothered you more than our...'moment' in the hallway, to be honest." He took a step closer to Nathan. "I appreciate how you and Jim have handled finding out what I am, I do. You’ve really been trying to accept me, even though I know it isn’t easy for you. But the truth is...you’re driving me crazy.”
“Me? You're the one who keeps...doingthings," Nathan said, more than happy to fall into a confrontational tone. "Then when I find you with a guy this morning, it’s all business as usual.”
“Nathan, you know I didn't sleep with him because I wanted to—Ihadto. If I thought I had another option...” he trailed for a moment as his eyes swept over Nathan, "I would have gladly accepted it."
“Dude.” Nathan held up his hands as if he could physically hold the conversation in place. “You're getting way ahead of yourself here.”
“I’m an incubus, Nathan," Sasha said plainly. "It isn’t possible for someone to be attracted to me and for me not to know about it. Especially when I’m spending most of my time with them.”
Nathan was suddenly very aware of how much closer Sasha was, but for the life of him, he couldn’t think of how to move away.
“I wouldn’t push the way I have been if I didn’t think something might come of it," Sasha said. "I wouldn’t make advances…if I didn’t think you kind of liked it.”
“Whoa,” Nathan said, leaning as far back as he could to avoid whatever Sasha was intending to do. “You need to just…back up, buddy. I don’t know what you think you know about me, but…sounds like you need to get that incubus-sense checked ‘cause it is way off.”
Sasha looked disappointed at first, but eventually he just looked skeptical. “Nathan, you can’t lie to me, or fool me when it comes to attraction. That you can only do to yourself. If someone is attracted to me, I know. How do you think we hunt?”
Walter's words replayed in Nathan's mind—He can read emotions, Nathan. He can feel what other people are feeling. That's how an incubus knows who to target when they feed.
“Let’s make a deal.”
“Huh?” Right now all Nathan wanted was to get out of the alley.
