Page 10 of Beside the Rolling Waves
A lot of times actually. She was really happy with her life for the most part. Well, had been happy about it until her sister’s phone call this morning. And now, it felt like her entire life had descended into chaos. Her sister had cancer. And was pregnant with twins. And to make everything a million times worse, Rodney. Here.
She wanted to cry. She wasn’t really that angry at him. She was more hurt than anything. She could admit that to herself, although she’d never admit it to him. Or anybody else. How could he do that to her? Why couldn’t he just say, “Hey, I’m a little more sophisticated than you are now, and you’re too childish for me”?
Even though she was almost thirty. Still, he was a good bit older than her, and he always seemed so much more mature.
Nothing had changed in that regard, considering how much of an idiot she had acted like today when she had been so angry she couldn’t even talk to him.
Why hadn’t she just talked to him in the barn, rather than deciding to meet on Wednesday, at the diner in Blueberry Beach, no less? What was she, a glutton for punishment? It would have been far better to hash it out today, in fifteen or twenty minutes, than have to spend an entire meal eating across from him.
She gasped. She hadn’t even considered that she was going to have to pay for that meal.
She was not going to let Rodney buy it.
But she really couldn’t afford to eat in a restaurant. It was all she could do to afford the beans and rice she had at home.
She pressed her lips together. She didn’t even have his number to be able to call him to cancel.
What had she been thinking?
She put the truck in reverse after giving it a minute to warm up and laughed at herself.
She hadn’t been thinking anything. First, her sister dropped her news of her pregnancy and then her cancer, and then Rodney. Obviously, she’d been overwhelmed. But she was an adult. She was supposed to be able to handle being overwhelmed. She wasn’t supposed to melt down over a day like she had. Although, she doubted she’d ever have a day like that again.
Then she laughed. With twins—she was going to be raising twins, for a while anyway—probably today was actually a calm, easy day compared to that.
Although Rodney would be helping her. That calmed her soul a bit, until she remembered that she was going to specifically request that Rodney not co-parent with her. They would switch the kids back and forth the way divorced people did. Because she couldn’t stand to do it any other way.
She pulled into Vera’s and shut the motor off. It was so nice to feel the heat from the heater that she almost let it run a little bit.
But it would be warm in Vera’s house, and she would be able to shed some of her layers.
Typically, Vera took the kids down to the basement and played with them down there while Becky cleaned; that way, everyone was out from underfoot. Otherwise, Vera said, Becky cleaned, and her kids just came behind her and messed everything back up.
Becky really didn’t mind. It made things more interesting when the kids were underfoot, but it did make it harder as well. Because they all wanted to help too. Which was fun, but she was getting paid to clean, not follow behind a two-year-old with a mop pretending to clean.
She wasn’t sure how many kids Vera and Dominic had. It changed, since they fostered some, who went in and out. Rightnow, they had a toddler and a preschooler, along with their older children.
She’d never met such bighearted people, and Vera was one of her heroes.
Taking a deep breath, she yanked on the door latch and shoved her shoulder against it to get the door open. It complied with a shriek, and it almost felt like it was complaining about the cold, which Becky could not fault it for.
After this, she had the church to clean, which was always a fun and peaceful time. And then she had to check in on Mr. Harris, who lived by himself. He only had a woodstove for heat, and Becky made sure that he had chopped wood brought into the house every day. He didn’t really pay her a whole lot. But she couldn’t quit that job. Mr. Harris’s children wanted to send him to a home, and he was trying as hard as he could to stay in the home he loved. He was in a sound mind and in pretty good physical condition, but at his age, which was eighty-eight, it was not a good idea for him to go outside and get his own firewood. Especially in the winter after it had snowed.
So, she shoveled the walk, made sure that his paper had been brought in, and that he had firewood. Occasionally she grabbed groceries for him too. She would get the groceries more if she could afford to spend the money on it.
Seeing the day’s work stretch out ahead of her, she trudged up the walk to get started.
Five
“Idon’t really like to say I told you so, but… I told you so.” Davis stood looking at Rodney. Davis and Matt Landry had been instrumental in Rodney’s upbringing, after his dad had cheated on his mother and his parents had died.
Matt had helped him with the horses he got interested in, mostly because of Becky, but he’d loved them himself. Which had led him to Cord Stryker, which had led him to Ford Hansen in Sweet Water, North Dakota. It was funny how life just worked out, and he could see God’s hand through it all.
“I really thought she’d understand,” he finally said. Davis had told him to just admit to Becky what happened. That he’d overextended himself, taken a gamble, because that’s what being in business was, and he failed. Big time. Lost everything. And had to declare bankruptcy.
He had started to rebuild before the ashes had settled, but that moved the timeline that he had set for him coming back and asking Becky to marry him.
He’d been so depressed, so desperate, so embarrassed that he quit talking to her altogether.
