Page 67 of Playing the Field
‘We’ll find a way,’ he promises. ‘And I’m going to call you every day. I’m not going to suddenly stop wanting to know how you are, what you’re up to, how the team’s getting on or any of those things.’
It’s late when we eventually head inside to bed, but I don’t think either of us sleep. I lie nestled into him with my head on his shoulder and my arm draped over his chest. I’m sure he can feel my eyelashes fluttering against his skin every time I blink.
He runs his hand over my arm, massages my shoulder and kisses the top of my head from time to time. Eventually we give up all pretence of sleeping and roll over till we’re facing each other. Then we kiss till the sunlight creeps under the curtain.
37
‘I might have to fill my boot up with cans of Red Bull,’ Ben says over breakfast, referring to the four-hour drive he’s got ahead of him.
‘Do you have one of those hydration backpacks, with a straw?’
He laughs, but it’s a hollower sound than usual. ‘That’s not a bad shout, but I wouldn’t want to get it all sticky.’
‘When’s your first meet-up with your teammates?’ I ask.
‘Tomorrow. But they’ll be fine. They’ll rib me a bit for letting the side down then we’ll just crack on. I’m not worried.’
‘And your new girlfriend, when does that get announced?’ I ask.
‘This evening.’ He looks away. ‘That’s why I have to get back today– there’s some event I have to be seen at. Then they can coincide breaking the news of our relationship with announcing I’m back on the team. Quite the diversionary tactic,’ he says bitterly.
I swallow my surprise. I don’t know why I thought it wouldn’t happen so quickly.
‘I’ll probably just fall asleep on her, though,’ Ben adds. ‘She’s not going to get any sparkling conversation out of me when I’m this tired. She’ll probably wonder what she’s got herself into.’
I can’t say I’d be too sad if she decided he was too boring to keep up the façade.
All too soon it’s time to say goodbye. Ben holds on to my hand for the longest time on his doorstep, and tells me again that he loves me before he finally releases me. On my drive home, it takes all my strength not to let our new reality overwhelm me.
Ben will call Dad and Cassie later to apologise for not saying goodbye in person. They might be disappointed but they’ll understand. I can’t say the same for when I explain about his new ‘relationship’, though. Like me, I think they’ll find that harder to get to grips with.
I’ll need to choose the right moment for that conversation. It will go much better if I can explain it without sounding upset. For now I’ll just throw myself into Crawford business and try to put it out of my mind.
We’ve sold more season tickets off the back of Saturday’s game and there are some requests for interviews that I need to look into following theHerald’s piece about the debut match. But for a good while I just stare at my inbox without taking anything in. How am I supposed to get into any kind of rhythm when all I can think about is how much I already miss Ben?
He’s promised to call me as soon as he’s settled in, and I keep my phone close, checking every few minutes in case I’ve missed him, even though he won’t even be off the motorway yet. Hours later, when I’m certain he must have arrived, I check several times that the volume is set to full and contemplate sending a test text to Phoebs to make sure it’s definitely working, but I know it is. Ben will have been swept up in a whirlwind upon getting back to Millford, with ‘back to work’ meetings to prepare for, friends to catch up with, food to buy and... her. He’ll call me when he can.
When Dad gets home from work, I finally fill him in on everything, which sends him into full ‘I warned you he was trouble’ mode. I think he’d been getting used to me and Ben being a couple, but now he’s back to thinking it was never a sensible move.
Later in the evening, a knock on my bedroom door interrupts my moping and Phoebs pokes her head through. ‘I thought you might need some company. Craig told me about Ben.’
I can’t help smiling. He must have let the rest of the team know he’s had to leave now. She must have known I’d be devastated.
‘Wanna talk about it?’ she asks.
‘He’s only been gone a few hours and I already hate it,’ I confess. Then I fill her in on Ben’s ‘PR campaign’, after she’s promised not to blab about it to Craig. Thankfully she understands there could be serious repercussions if we don’t keep this between ourselves.
‘It sounds really tough,’ she empathises. ‘If there’s anything I can do to help you deal with it, just say.’
I thank her and glance down at my laptop. ‘I’m just glad I’ve got Crawford to keep me busy– otherwise I’d probably drive myself insane.’
She props herself up against my pillows at the other end of my bed. ‘Speaking of Crawford, if it ends up being successful– I mean when– do you think you might be able to find a job for me?’
So far her search for employment hasn’t amounted to much.
‘Wouldn’t you rather do something you’re interested in?’
‘Well yes, but I’m hardly in a position to set up my own business as a party organiser, am I?’
