Page 11 of Doors & Windows
But of all those instances, Liam had never felt closer to him than he did right now; there were no more barriers left between them.
It was exhilarating. It was terrifying.
Carefully, Liam tipped his head forward, closing the few inches of height to rest his forehead against Jonah’s. There was a thrum of something unspoken between them, something that started the moment Jonah called out to him at the train station and asked him to stay and now crested.
Liam refused to make any assumptions where Jonah was concerned. He hadn’t agreed to come back with him out of any expectation of what would or wouldn’t happen in the privacy of his room, and he was pretty sure Jonah knew that. HeneededJonah to know that.
“We don’t have to do anything.” It was a whisper, but still Liam’s voice sounded too loud in the proximity. He dialed back and tried again. “I mean…”
“Liam,” Jonah cut in, his voice thick with an inflection Liam had only heard from him once before.
“Yeah?”
“I’ve missed you, too.”
And then he was kissing him. Liam wasn’t sure which of them leaned into it first, only that it was inevitable. Once they crossed that line, Liam couldn’t remember how he had ever survived a gap in time without this.
It was gentle at first. Liam kissed him back with the care he might have taken to balance a soap bubble on the tip of his finger, but there was a hunger that burned behind it, ignited by the taste of Jonah. A noise that Liam could be embarrassed about later slipped from his throat, and it seemed to shift something in the air. Jonah pulled back, Liam following his lips helplessly for half a second before looking up at him through heavy lids. He wore a flushed, dazed expression, their labored breaths mingling in the sparse space between them. The tips of their noses brushed, every point of contact like a live wire. And then, like a wave breaking on the shore, they crashed forward again, this time without reserve.
Jonah’s lips were soft, the lingering taste of chocolate and strawberrieslayered over the perfect essence ofhim. He molded his palms to the shape of Liam’s body, sliding around to his back to pull him in closer. The heat of it shocked a gasp out of Liam, borrowing breath from Jonah’s mouth. Their bodies pressed together, chests and stomachs and hips. It was urgent; a sensation that bordered on overwhelming, the way his desire consumed him. Wanting Jonah was a flood. It poured over him, out of him, crashing all his systems. It was almost frightening, losing himself so completely to this feeling. He would have followed Jonah anywhere, done anything he asked of him.
The grip on his waist tightened. Liam complied with the first gentle coax of movement, the slightest nudge backward, his feet stumbling messily under him as Jonah guided him toward the bed. He let himself drop when his legs hit the mattress, but they didn’t break contact. Jonah followed him down, expertly slotting a knee on either side of Liam’s hips. Liam’s hands went to his waist on instinct, pulling him flush as their kiss became something ravenous.
Was this what being high felt like? Jonah’s weight, strong and solid, settled in his lap? The drape of his arms around Liam’s neck? The smell and taste and feel of him all around him was a drug that dulled the last of his inhibitions.
Liam yielded under the hands that guided him back, falling, falling, falling until he was flat on the mattress. Jonah knelt over him, his face half in shadow but unmistakably wrought with desire. With his palms braced on Liam’s chest, Liam could feel every tremor like a current travelling down Jonah’s arms, through his fingers, down to the marrow of Liam’s own ribcage. He watched Jonah carefully, ready to slow things down at the first sign of apprehension, but he didn’t buckle. Instead, he held Liam’s eyes and gave the first experimental roll of his hips.
Even through layers of clothes, the movement cut a trail of sparks through Liam’s core. His eyes fell shut as his body returned the motion in kind.
“Jonah.”Liam was a supplicant lost in prayer and dark eyes as he whispered his name.
They had been here only once before—in a different bedroom, in a different state, under much differentcircumstances. The memory brought with it a burst of clarity, and Liam opened his eyes. He splayed his hands over Jonah’s thighs, sliding gently across the denim stretched taut over skin and muscle.
“Is this…?” Liam tried, his throat dry. “This is okay?”
Before, in Liam’s old room, things hadn’t gone much further than where they were now—hands groping desperately, mouths eager and hips moving. Tonight, they moved with an intensity that made him think it could turn into something more.
“It’s okay.” Jonah’s rough voice spoke shivers into Liam’s body. He dipped forward, moving as if to tuck his face into the crook of Liam’s neck, but stopped short and met his eyes. “Are you? Okay?”
Liam wasn’t sure how he looked right now, but if it was anything like how he felt, he could understand why Jonah felt the need to ask.
“I’ve never…” Liam pinched his eyes shut, embarrassed. “You know I’ve never…”
Jonah went still. Liam opened his eyes in time to catch a flash of concern as Jonah began retreating. Liam scrambled to stop him with a hand on his shoulder, pulling some of his grounding weight back onto him.
“No, no, sorry,” Liam said quickly. “I didn’t mean… That wasn’t ano.” Jonah hesitated for only a second before Liam placed his palms on either side of his face, thumbs brushing over his cheekbones. “It’s a yes,” he promised.
Jonah nodded. “It’s a yes for me, too.” Then he ducked his head into the crook of Liam’s neck, and time became harder to quantify.
There were a lot of breathless, half-asked questions:
Should we…?
Do you want to…?
Can I…?
A lot of fervent nods and trembling hands and promises—pleas—of yes yesyes.
