Page 95 of Kneeling for Them
I can’t help laughing a little, and I tug her into my arms.“You’re the worst fangirl of all—remember how you didn’t even know my music when we first sang together?”
She laughs, too.Then, in a quiet voice, she says, “I don’t want to ride your coattails or benefit from your hard work, Sebastian.”
“You don’t need to,” I say.“Any success you find?You’ve earned it on your own.”
Her beautiful face is so full of hope and trust, my chest aches.
“You really think that?”she asks.
“Yes.I’ve never been prouder ofanyonethan I am of you.Play it again for me?”
Giving me a shy smile, she plays and sings one more time.The music causes my heart to stir, and chills to erupt over my skin.She’s got to come to terms, eventually, with the fact that she’s talented as fuck.
Once she’s done, she says, “Thank you for coming here to listen and cheer me on.”
“Anytime, Ella.”I clear my throat.We can’t just ignore what happened the day before.“Yesterday, I said some things.”
She nods.“I did, too.”
“I told you I love you.And I meant that—I just wanted to tell you in a different way, when we weren’t mad at each other.”
Her smile is brilliant.“I love you, too.”
“Whenever we’re arguing, we have to remember that, huh?”
“Yeah.”She sits up taller and kisses me.I cup the back of her neck and hold her close, deepening the kiss, taking more, demanding more.With Ella, I always want more.
But I don’t want to jeopardize her ability to practice here, and so I pull back.“Thank you for sharing your music with me,” I say.
“I’m so glad you came.I’m sorry we argued.”
“I still love you, even when we fight,” I say.
She squeezes my hand.“Good timing, I guess, because there’s something else you’re probably going to be unhappy about.”
I try not to feel defensive immediately, but it’s fucking hard after a lead-in like that.Still, I wait for her to continue.
“I didn’t want to tell you about this,” she says, “but I also don’t want to go behind your back.I’ve asked Lin to help me find Alyssa, the woman you allegedly assaulted.”
“Allegedly?”I stand up, needing some space.The room feels too close.Ella feels too close.
“Yeah.I mean, we have no proof it happened.Alyssa hasn’t come forward.”
“She was paid not to,” I say.
“That’s what Trina says.”Ella stands up and folds her arms across her chest, looking adorably stubborn…but stubborn just the same.
“I don’t want you looking into this,” I say.
“Is it because you’re afraid I’ll find out there’s nothing to it, and Trina was lying all along?”
“That’s not what you’re going to find.”I turn around, unable to face her.“You’re going to find out that I’m a monster, and you’re going to leave.”
“I’m going to prove you wrong.”
Her hands are soft on my arms, she’s tracing one of my tattoos.Without looking down, I know it’s the guitar tattoo that transforms into flying triplets and eighth notes at the guitar’s neck.
I spin around, and Ella steps back, looking shocked.I catch my reflection in the decorative mirror placed over the piano.I look fierce, angry.No wonder Ella is flinching away from me.
