Page 80 of Break the Barrier
He fiddles with his keys for a moment. “You wanna come over? Have a coffee or something? I feel like I barely got to talk with you today.”
I’m unsure if that’s an excuse or not, but I don’t call him out on it. “Sure.”
When we arrive, Logan sets about making coffee and tells me to make myself comfortable.
How do I tell him that I don’t want to make myself comfortable, that I want him to finally be with me? How do I exit my comfort zone when I’m not sure if that’s where his mind is at?
He goes to the fireplace and builds a fire.
“I need to use your bathroom,” I blurt out suddenly, embarrassed at my actions and how my heart is hammering beneath my chest. I rush down the hallway and lock myself inside the room, bracing my arms on the sink and looking at myself in the mirror.
“Grow up, Thea. You’ve had sex before.” I mentally groan. Eric totally fucked me over.
When we first had sex, it was full of love, and he was sensitive to my needs. He showed me that it could be fun.
But it wasn’t long before he’d manipulated my feelings and made me feel low and bad about myself, about my body. Talked about the cellulite on my thighs and any imperfection he could point out, he would say that the girls at the club never had that.
It made me feel like throwing up.
It got to the point where I stopped being with him, where Iwould fake headaches and according to him, “force him to turn to the girls at the club.”
At that point, I didn’t care. Iwantedhim to be with them instead of me. I wanted him to be gone all the time.
I dreaded when he would come home, when he would tell me in detail what he would do at the club.
I straighten up and glare at myself in the mirror before murmuring, “Logan is not Eric. Logan is a good man who…he’ll take care of me. He will.” I nod at myself in the mirror and fluff up my hair. “You are a strong, attractive woman who knows what she wants, go take it.”
Mentally prepared and impressed with my speech to myself, I run my wrists under the cool water to calm myself down.
Drying my hands quickly, I open the door and head back into the living room.
Logan stands there, staring at the fireplace. He took his hat off as soon as we got here, but his wedding attire is still in place, down to his shiny cowboy boots.
“Hey.”
He turns at the sound of my voice, and his eyes heat as he takes me in. If I need further proof that he’s into me, the look on his face says it all.
He walks over to me, his eyes not leaving my own, and when he’s close enough, I tilt my chin up to meet his eyes.
Logan’s hand cups my cheek and pulls me closer. “You’re so beautiful.”
I feel heat rising in my cheeks, and before I can psyche myself out further, I lean forward and capture his lips with my own, moving to put my arms over his shoulders and around his neck.
I tell him with my kiss that I want this, that all these weeksof being with him, of dancing on Friday nights and shamelessly flirting with him, of him slowly becoming my best friend, have led us to this path, and I am ready to take that next step.
His arm wraps around my waist, holding me so close that nothing could come between us.
Turning us, he presses my back against the wall of the hallway and continues to kiss and touch me until my entire body is lit on fire. The roughness of his hands brings chills to my skin, and I beg him with my motions to keep going.
My hands tangle in the hair at the nape of his neck, and his mouth tears from mine, trailing hot kisses down my neck and over my collarbone. I hear myself panting, my eyes close, and I just let myself feel him. I let myself get lost in the moment.
Without thought, my leg raises to wrap around his waist, and before I can process the movement, Logan hikes me up so that I’m completely supported by him.
Holding me tighter, Logan looks at me, his eyes holding my own. In them, I see something I’ve never seen before, not directed at me anyway. I see love. I see passion, and I see understanding.
Without a word, he carries me further down the hallway, walking into his bedroom and lying me on the bed, seamlessly coming with me until his weight is comfortably holding me down.
I keep my eyes trained on him, and when he kisses me, I feel everything I saw in his eyes and my heart. My heart feels nearly ready to burst at the amount of emotion I feel at this very moment.
