Page 83 of In You
"It's okay. I'm not trying to make you feel bad, I just wanted you to know. I really do love you. It's scary, and hard, because I feel like I just gave you the power to hurt me."
"I won't hurt you, I won't."
He nods, taking a big drink of his tea and then settles his hand on my thigh. "Imma hold you to that," he breathes quietly with a smile behind the cup. The corner of his mouth tips up, but he keeps his gaze on the mirror to the dresser across from us. "So, does that mean we go together?"
I snort laughing, pressing my fingers to my lips. "What are we,in middle school?" Itease, tears streaming down my face as I try to get over how tickled I am. He takes the cup out of my hand until I'm done falling all over the pillows screaming-laughing. He puts the tray down on the floor and then gets up. "You know what? That's what we need!" He claps his hands together then goes to the closet, throwing the door open and then flicking through. "Here, clean up and put this on. We're going out for a day of fun!"
My eyes go round. "Really?"
He tosses another lounge set onto the bed at my feet, and to see him be so excited about something ignites my own excitement. "Yes! Go take a shower, I'm going to make us a late breakfast since we slept in, and then we'll head out."
I scramble from the covers, eager to get out. I bounce on the balls of my feet, clasping my hands together. "Oh my God, are you serious? We're really going out for a whole day?"
Caleb nods. "Yes." Leaning forward, he smacks my ass hard, making me giggle and then stumble a few steps, my eyes round.
"Whoa there, tiger," I tease, putting my hand back there to rub the burn away. "You might start something you can't finish."
He cuts his eyes to me. "Oh I always finish it.Always."
Much like he did earlier, I inch my way backwards to the door as we go back and forth a few times about who's really going to finish who and then slip through it.
Energized.
30
New Families
Caleb
Ican'trememberthelast time I had such an amazing time, much less thisgoodof a time with a woman. But with Tamryn, she makes everything feel so easy and effortless. I don't know if it's because there's no chance for her to have an ulterior motive, or if it's because our trauma bonds us like two puzzle pieces who fit together just right. But whatever it is, I'm grateful.
Because for the first time in my life, I get to actually see what it feels like to be normal.
To feel like I am just a man, who's showing his girl out for a good time and man doesn't it feel good.
We left the house with no plan, utilizing the forty-five minute drive to the town to sporadically look up anything and everything we could get into. We decided not to stay out too long, because we didn't want to leave the dogs alone for hours on end, but we found some random stuff to get into.
We've gone ice skating, which is where I learned her balance is shit, forcing us to be stuck to each other the entire time. Then we went for hot chocolate and a movie. And, because she's seemingly got a wicked sweet tooth all of a sudden, she wants to stop at the store on the way home for ingredients to make brownie a la modes.
"I think I'm going to make some chili tomorrow now that the weather's decided to make up its mind about keeping snow on the ground," I say, grabbing a bag of onions while we're in produce.
"Ohhh, can you make it spicy?" she asks, leaving my side to walk over to the wall where all the peppers are. I push the cart over, grabbing a few more things on the way, and watch as she carefully picks out four or five jalapeños. "And maybe some sour cream?"
"Of course. Might want to get a few more of those, sweetheart. I make a big,bigpot. The one I keep in the cabinet above the fridge."
"Ah!" she says, reaching forward and grabs a few more, plus a serrano.
I tear off a couple of the plastic bags, tying them off and then tuck her under my shoulder. She feels so good next to me I don't know how I've never not had her there. I put my lips to her curls, giving her a kiss. "Hey, do we need to get you any more product for your hair?"
"Yeah, and I think we might need to get some more deodorant too.Hey,"she says, tilting her head to look up at me while we walk, "we can't forget to get your whiskey before we leave. You're almost out."
Feeling considered, my eyes lower as I contemplate for a few seconds as we walk along the aisles at how much it means to me to have someone looking out for me and my needs for a change. Her hand looks so small next to mine as she helps steer the cart towards the bakery aisle, hell bent on getting her sweet stuff. I put my hand over hers, and as she looks up with me we share a small smile.
One that has my heart melting because…I love this woman. Point blank.
I've got my guard down for once in my fucking life, pushing the cart through the aisles and watching with amusement as our little brownie stop is turning into pies, and cobblers, and cakes complete with candles to light on them, when a giggle catches my ear.
I look to the side and see a couple with four kids, one of them a baby sitting in his seat in their cart. The dad laughs as he picks up a little girl with pigtails who's about three, and she lays her head tiredly on his shoulder, sucking her thumb in her mouth. I grin at how wholesome they look, suddenly wondering what it'd be like to pick a little kid up in my arms at the end of a long day when we're struggling through a grocery trip before going home.
