Page 64 of City of Secrets and Shadows
“You’re too tense,” Jalend said quietly from behind me. “Loosen your knees. Move with the motion, don’t fight it.”
I tried to follow his advice, surprised he’d offered any assistance. My next steps were steadier, though the pontoons still felt treacherously unstable beneath me.
Halfway across, I made the mistake of looking down into the water. It was getting deeper — I could no longer see the bottom clearly. My heart began to race, memories flashing of a flooding river that had once swept through our village, carrying away livestock and very nearly my younger brother.
“Something wrong, provincial?” Valeria called back, noticing my hesitation. “Not getting frightened of a little water, are you?”
“I’m fine,” I said through gritted teeth, forcing myself to continue forward.
As I approached the final pontoon before the next platform, I noticed Valeria whispering something to Cassia and Drusilla. They glanced back at me, poorly concealed smiles playing on their lips. Something in their expressions made my skin prickle with unease.
Just as I reached the last pontoon, Drusilla suddenly shifted her weight, causing the platform to rock violently. I wavered, arms windmilling as I fought for balance. For a terrible moment, I thought I’d recover — then Cassia “accidentally” kicked the edge of my pontoon as she stepped onto a solid platform.
The world tilted. I plunged sideways into the water with a startled cry, the cold shocking the air from my lungs. I expected to touch the bottom immediately, but there was nothing — just open water beneath me, deeper than it had appeared from above.
Panic seized me. I thrashed wildly, trying to keep my head above water, but my tunic had become a sodden weight dragging me down. I could hear laughter, distant and cruel, as I struggled.
“I thought provincials were supposed to be resourceful!” Valeria’s voice carried over the water. “Surely you can manage a little swim?”
I gulped air between desperate strokes, memories of that long-ago flood overwhelming me. The roaring water, my brother’s terrified face as I’d barely reached him in time, the exhaustion of fighting the current...
“She can’t swim,” I heard Jalend say flatly from somewhere above me.
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Valeria replied. “Everyone can swim.”
I went under again, swallowing water as I clawed toward the surface. The weight of my clothes pulled me down, my limbs growing heavier with each desperate movement. When I broke the surface again, I could barely gasp half a breath before sinking.
Through water-blurred vision, I saw Valeria and her friends watching from the platform, their expressions shifting from amusement to uncertainty as they realized I truly was in trouble. Cassia took a half-step forward, then hesitated, looking at Valeria.
“She’s faking,” Valeria insisted, though her voice held less conviction. “Looking for sympathy.”
My vision began to darken at the edges. The faces of those who believed in me flashed through my mind: Septimus, whose faith in me never wavered; Marcus, who saw my potential when others saw only a slave; Tavi, whose friendship had kept me human when all I wanted was vengeance. I was failing them all, drowning in a training exercise instead of dying for a purpose.
Just as consciousness began to slip away, I felt strong arms wrap around me, pulling me upward. I broke the surface, coughing violently, water spewing from my mouth as I gulped desperately for air.
“I’ve got you,” Jalend’s voice was low and steady in my ear as he towed me toward the nearest platform. My vision swam in and out of focus, consciousness flickering like a dying flame.
His strong arms lifted me from the water, cradling me against his chest as he climbed one-handed onto the wooden surface. For a moment, I was aware only of his heartbeat, steady and strong beneath my cheek, the rhythm somehow anchoring me as my body trembled uncontrollably.
“Breathe,” he commanded softly, setting me down but keeping one arm around my shoulders as I doubled over, coughing up water.
I clutched at his forearm, desperate for something solid to hold onto as my body purged the lake from my lungs. Through streaming eyes, I became aware of his face — closer than it had ever been, his usual mask of indifference replaced by something I couldn’t quite name. Concern? Recognition?
For a heartbeat, his steel-grey eyes met mine, and something electric passed between us — some silent understanding that neither of us belonged to the world of these pampered nobles. His hand tightened almost imperceptibly on my shoulder, and I saw his throat work as he swallowed whatever words had nearly escaped.
Then, just as quickly as it had appeared, the moment shattered. His expression closed off, the wall slamming back into place as he became aware of the instructors rushing toward us.
“She needs air,” he said flatly, withdrawing his arm from my shoulders and creating a careful distance between us.
The sudden absence of his warmth left me even more aware of my sodden clothes, my humiliating failure, and the dozens of eyes watching my disgrace unfold.
“Team Seven is disqualified,” the instructor announced. “Failure to complete the challenge and maintain team safety.”
Jalend pulled himself to his feet beside me, water streaming from his clothes. His expression had returned to its usual unreadable state, no trace remaining of that brief connection we’d shared. But I couldn’t forget it — that single moment when the Northern heir had seen me, truly seen me.
“A provincial who can’t swim,” I heard Drusilla stage-whisper to Cassia. “How utterly provincial.”
Their laughter cut deeper than any blade. I pushed myself to my feet, legs threatening to buckle beneath me. Every eye was on me — the pretender, the fraud, exposed by something as simple as water.
