Page 69 of The Prom Queen Project
“That’s not true.”
“Don’t fucking lie to me,” I spat, biting back tears. “Maybe you tolerate me, but you don’t actually like me. And it’s not just you. It’s like no one wants to be my friend anymore. Am I really that bad?”
“No, you’re notbad, Clarke, but that’s your problem. You’re too perfect. It’s annoying.” He huffed, burying his face in his hands. “You kinda make it easy for people to envy you.”
I stared at him, confusion written across my face. “Envy?”
“Yeah,envy. It means—”
“I know what it means, Andrew. I’m just the last person anyone should be jealous of.”
He coughed out a dry laugh. “You’re cheer captain. You’re white. You’re an objectively attractive female. You have a shit ton of minions at your beck and call. You—”
“Yeah, look, I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I don’t exactly have many friends anymore.”
“Then, why don’t you just ditch Elliot and go back to your cheerleaders?”
“What?” My voice went up an octave. “You think Elliot’s the reason why I don’t have friends?”
“That’s when this whole thing started, right? If you’re gonna dump Elliot, then spare us the drama and just get it over with.”
I turned to glare at Dani, who had been way too quiet during this conversation.
“And you think the same thing?”
She shrugged, resting her chin in her hands. “Everyone knows the cheerleaders and jocks don’t condone dating outside of their incestual little family. No surprise they pushed you out for dating Elliot.”
“They didn’t push me out.” I pursed my lips. “I left.”
Andrew glared at me. “Yeah, right. Why would the Queen Bee abandon her lackeys?”
“Because they’re selfish assholes.”
“So, youdon’tlike your friends?”
“They’re not my friends. Not anymore, at least.”
Dani spoke, again causing our heads to pivot in her direction. “Then why’d you hang out with them in the first place?”
“I guess I just wanted to fit in.”
“Oh, please.” Andrew rolled his eyes. “Fitting in is overrated.”
I balled my hands into fists. My words came out with heated passion. “No.Fitting in is everything.”
“Why do you care?” Dani slouched, seemingly unimpressed with my response. “Doesn’t it come naturally to you?”
“It’s the opposite of natural.”
Andrew crossed his arms. “You’re literally the cookie-cutter mold of a popular high school teen. What the hell do you mean it’s ‘the opposite of natural?’”
Pretending I didn’t have a thirst for knowledge wasn’t natural. Hiding my love of literature wasn’t natural. Actinglike I was a happy-go-lucky blonde with no notable personality distinctions wasn’t natural. Wearing itchy, skin-tight clothing that constricted my lungs wasn’t natural. Learning to exist without Jessie wasn’t natural.Trying to bury my past wasn’t natural.
“You don’t know me.”
“Then enlighten us,” Andrew said, flicking his eyes upward in a barely perceptible roll. “Because from where I’m sitting it seems like you have theperfectlife, with theperfectfriends, and theperfectfamily, with aperfecthouse, and—”
“I’m not fucking perfect, okay?” I fumed with an exasperated sigh while flinging my hands up. “I used to be bullied for how disgustingly imperfect I am, so there you have it,” I groaned, my stomach beginning to churn. “I’m not some two-dimensional character from a Disney movie that was born into a flawless life with a flawless personality. I have my own shit just like everyone else. I’m just better at hiding it.”
