Page 32 of Creatures Like Us
The corner of his mouth twitches into a half smile. “Kind. Stubborn. She enjoyed the little things in life, like books, the garden, and our animals.”
“You took care of her?”
“Yes. For a long time, as her illness progressed. Do you know about ALS?”
“Not really,” I say with a shrug. “Was she in a lot of pain?”
Noah nods. “One day, she told me to bring a bunch of her pills from the cabinet. Then she told me to put them all in her palm. She could barely bring them to her mouth at that point, but?…?she took them. I kept watch over her. Held her hand while she passed on to the other side.”
Fuck, okay?…?That’s pretty sad. Really sad. No wonder he’s like a shell of a human, having been through a thing like that.
“Did you—” I bite the word off, frowning. “Did you know that was what she wanted? Beforehand?”
He shrugs. “We had talked about it. One morning, she was ready.”
“Kind of an asshole move, don’t you think?”
“What?”
“Forcing you to participate in a thing like that?”
“She needed me to help her,” Noah says slowly. “And I was happy to ease her pain.”
“Yeah, but still. She left you alone. It must’ve been hard for you.”
“It was. It is.”
I search for his hand in the dark, and I wrap my fingers around the soft edges of it. “It’s okay.”
I glance at him to see silent tears running down his cheeks. His Adam’s apple bobs as he tries to hold them back.
“It’s okay,” I whisper again, squeezing his hand. “Do you want to sleep?”
Noah glances at me, eyes gleaming. “Here?”
“Yeah.” I scoot over, leaving more room for him to turn on his side. I line up against him, spooning him.
In this position, I could easily hook my arm around his throat and choke him out. Even so, he lets me do this. I inch closer up against his back and slide a hesitant arm around his waist. There, I lay a hand over his heart, feeling the beat of it against my palm.Thump, thump, thump.
“It’s okay,” I whisper into his ear. “You can cry.”
I can’t believe I’m doing this, but somehow, it feels more right than anything else in my life. Just for this moment, I want to forget once more about the external factors keeping us apart. Just for a little while, I want that connection to stitch us together.
Bit by bit, Noah lets go of the tenseness trapped in his body. He relaxes into my embrace, and he lets the tears come, not holding them back any longer. I fall asleep to his soft, hulking sobs, soothed by the fact that with my help, he can let go of at least a piece of his grief, however little, and that I can be there for him, holding him through that pain.
Chapter 10
Noah
Itrytorememberif I’ve ever slept in the same bed as somebody else—except for Auntie when I was a young child, which hardly counts—but I come up blank.
Asher is the first.
I suppose he’s a lot of firsts for me. The first I imprisoned in my basement. The first, aside from Auntie, to look at me with understanding in his eyes rather than scorn.
The first to kiss me.
I bring a hand up to my mouth and brush a finger along my lower lip. It doesn’t feel like anything has changed, but the tingle between my legs makes me think otherwise.
