Page 52 of His Gentle Omega
But even as I started to protest, I knew Alex was right. Edwardhadtried to kill me, and it wasn’t the first time. It certainly wasn’t the first time he had hit me, left bruises, broken bones even.
“Look, Shay, do not kid yourself and think these people aren’t going to try to contest this filing. They will. And they will use everything they can against you to prove you can’t take care of Lucas. That you are an unfit parent. I know lawyers like the Clarks have.” He smiled, but it was a feral, predatory smile that lacked the warmth from earlier. “I used to be one of those lawyers. I know how they think. I know what moves they will make. But if you don’t want to do this, if it’s too much, that’s okay. I understand this is a lot, and this will probably get really ugly. If you want us to take our chances with only filing the Alpha Law paperwork, we can do that. This is your show. I’m just the guy who files the papers, and uses big, fancy words in court if it comes to that.”
Edward might not give one fuck about Lucas, but I had no doubt he would try to take him from me just to hurt me. Or use him as a pawn to get me back. It wasn’t even that he wanted me back because he loved me. He didn’t love me–I doubted he had ever loved me. I was nothing more to him than a pretty possession and he had made it clear no one else would ever have me.
Edward played mind games like he was playing a championship chess game. Sad to say, I had fallen for his manipulations more than once.
But Russell and Graham Clark, Edward’s parents, would fight for Lucas. And they would fight hard and dirty. They continually turned a blind eye to their only child’s destructive behavior, going so far on several occasions to force him to do what they wanted with bribery. It was no wonder Edward had turned out the way he had. They had even seen the bruises, the broken bones, when I couldn’t hide them. No one was as clumsy as Edward claimed I was, and I had seen the truth in their eyes at my silence. They knew exactly what their son was capable of.
There was no way in hell I would let my son be raised by any of them.
Lucas was the one truly good and pure thing that had come out of my poor life choices.
But did I have it in me to fight them in court? I was so fucking tired. Bone, soul weary. A tiredness that had nothing to do with barely being on my feet from being sick. No, this was an exhaustion born of fighting, begging, pleading, and being constantly on edge twenty-four-seven.
Of never knowing when the next shoe would drop. When the next screaming match would begin, or what slight thing would set it off. When the next punch would be thrown, the next verbal slice of words would cut so deep I was sure it would never heal. Of wondering if I wouldn’t be able to get there in time, to get in front of Lucas, and Edward would hurt our child. If this was the time he would end my life.
Filing charges against Edward meant admitting what had happened. Saying out loud that I was an abuse victim. That Ihad let someone hurt me, repeatedly, over and over. That I was weak.
Survivor, my tiger whispered.Not weak. You did what you had to do to survive.
No thanks to you.
I’m here now, Shay. I’m getting stronger every day, just like you. Don’t stop fighting now. You stop fighting and he wins. You’re telling him what he did was okay. And it wasn’t okay. None of it was okay.
Moving forward meant admitting all the things that Edward had done to me. It meant standing up and saying that what he had done wasn’t acceptable. It meant standing up for myself and my son, because I refused to raise him to think that treating anyone like Edward had treated me was okay. Because none of it was okay, and I had to fight for Lucas. I had to fight for myself.
It was time for me to tell the truth and stop protecting Edward out of some misguided version of love, or fear, or shame and guilt that I carried around inside me.
Blinking, I cleared my vision and focused on Alex, as he patiently waited for my decision.
“File the charges,” I whispered, then cleared my throat, until I found my voice. “I have pictures. Other…instances. Hospital dates. I don’t want to use them unless we have to.” My eyes implored him to understand how fucking hard this was for me. “I can give you some names of people who will tell you what they saw and heard.”
Maria and Albert absolutely would, I knew. Possibly Marcus, but I didn’t trust what side he was on despite him letting us go that night, so probably not. “I’m just trying to protect Lucas as much as possible. Edward is still his father. I don’t want to badmouth him to our child, but I will do what I need to do to keep him safe.”
Alex gave a quick nod of his head, typing furiously on his computer keyboard. “I don’t think I’ll have any trouble with the assault and battery. The attempted murder will be harder to prove, if it comes to that. I’m hoping his lawyers will want to negotiate a compromise. And I’ll be asking the judge to grant a restraining order against Edward. It will be temporary unless we need to extend it. The Clarks are wealthy and powerful, but there’s one thing most people like them don’t want.”
“What’s that?” All the things he was saying to me swirled around in my brain, like I was on a tilt-a-whirl ride. I never did like those things, and I really just wanted to get off.
“They don’t like their family business splashed around courtrooms or the news.”
“You think they will just let us be?” Please, please, Goddess do not make me have to go into a courtroom and tell strangers what had happened to me. What I had let happen to me. Please don’t put my son through that.
“I’m hoping so.” Alex had stopped typing and sat back. “Regardless, even if they don’t come to the hearing on the Alpha Law, the judge is going to want you to have certain things in order. I know this judge. He’s tough but fair.”
“What kinds of things?”
“A job, adequate childcare, housing. He may want to speak to Lucas.”
“No!” Springing out of my seat, I paced in front of the little space between the chair and the desk. “I don’t want Lucas involved in this.”
“Sit down, Shay.” Alex didn’t raise his voice, but there was a commanding tone that the alpha inside me wanted to bristle at. Sinking into the chair, I sighed, feeling defeated. My nerves were well and truly shot.
“Like I said, Judge Stewart is tough but fair. When he wants to speak to a child, he does it in his chambers, away from the court and the parents. The child is free to speak and Stewart listens. He’s been sitting the bench for thirty years in family court. He knows what he’s about. What you need to do is exactly what I tell you to do. Cooperate. And when we go to court, no outbursts. Let me handle any bullshit the Clarks throw at us. We’ll meet again before the court date to go over any filings or countersuits they might try to bring.”
There was a brief knock on the door, and Irene bustled in with a stack of papers and her cheery smile. There was something comforting about the woman’s presence. She had a grandmotherly air about her, with a side of I’m-not-going-to-put-up-with-any-shit.
“Here’s all the documents you requested, and Tessa called.” She tapped one pink painted nail against a yellow sticky note on top of the stack. Alex thanked her with a smile, pulling the sticky note off as she retreated back to her guard post.
