Page 86 of His Sassy Omega
Lachlan snorted at me, blowing out air loudly through his mouth. “Do you honestly think I hadn’t figured that out, five minutes after meeting you? After we touched that first time? I’m still here, Quinn.”
I blinked, because…well, he was just full of logic this morning, wasn’t he? Still, I wasn’t convinced I could ever be what he wanted. “What are you saying?”
He sighed heavily, then came over to sit at my hip again. This time I moved over about the half inch of room I had to spare on the small bed, and swiped angrily at the tears that were still falling from my eyes. Damn these hormones!
He pushed my curls back from my forehead, then gently wiped at my tears with one long finger. “I’ve learned a lot about myself these past weeks.”
“Yeah?” I whispered.
“Yeah.” He nodded. “Being the oldest Sinclair heir kind of sucks.”
A laugh bubbled up from me, because he was so miffed by the whole thing, and it caught me by surprise. He raised a dark brow at me, and I muttered, “Sorry.”
“My dad was a lot older than my mom,” he continued, and I stayed silent. Not because he’d asked – ordered – me to earlier, but because he was so serious. And talking about our feelings wasn’t either of our strong suits.
I’d always held myself a little back from him, and I was beginning to realize he might have been doing the exact same thing. “I didn’t realize how much older until a few weeks ago. My mom and I had a really…adult conversation, I guess. I don’t know, but it felt more like I was talking to a friend, and not my mom, if that makes any sense.”
I nodded because it did. We always look at our parents as well, our parents, which was how it should be. I think we tended to forget that parents were actual people, before becoming parents. They were men and women, with dreams, and problems, wants and needs, the same as ours. It was mind boggling and confusing, but made sense.
“My dad and I were pretty close when he was alive. Looking back, I remember him spending a lot more time with me than the other boys. To him, I was the heir, so my brothers didn’t matter as much. He would always take me aside from them, and make sure I understood that as the oldest, certain things were expected of me. Certain behaviors were expected from me, not only because I was the firstborn, but because I was a Sinclair. I needed to be aware of how my behavior would be perceived by people in this town. Brendan, Finn and Jamie could run wild, and he never said a word to them. If I laughed too loud, he would just give me a look, and remind me how I was expected to behave. It all sounds so ridiculous, but looking back, my dad was old school in much of his thinking.”
I had so many questions I wanted to ask, but I didn’t. This was a time for me to listen. I was getting more of a glimpse into what made my alpha tick. My cat was telling me to sit up and pay attention, even as I shushed him.
“I was ten when my dad died. Massive heart attack on the golf course. He was there at breakfast, and then he was just gone. I didn’t realize until talking to my mom recently, how much his words had ingrained themselves into my brain even at that young age. They stayed there, all these years, in the background but always present. I let his words mold me into the man I was. Even if it meant burying any part of myself I didn’t think my dad would approve of.”
My hand reached out to smooth the frown lines that had taken up residence between his black as night brows. He grabbed my hand and pushed it against his cheek. His barely there, constant five o’clock beard scratchy against the flesh of my palm. He turned his head and brushed one of his soft kisses against my skin, and my whole body reacted to just that touch from him, lighting up.
“I think – I know – what I was looking for in a mate, was what my dad had told me was acceptable. And I would have been happy with that. A quiet mate, who took care of my house, cooked, and cleaned for me, took care of our pups. I would have been happy, and probably a bit bored, honestly, but I would have been fine. Until you. Meeting you was like a tidal wave crashing over me, and cleansing all of that away from me.”
“What is it you want?” I swallowed hard around the words, my heart hopeful, my brain not willing to hope for a second.
He gave me his shy little smile that I loved almost as much as his bright, brilliant one. “I want…” He hesitated, looking away from my prying eyes, and down at the sparkling linoleum of the floor. I turned his chin towards me with a strong finger, forcing him to look at me.
“Nope, none of that,” I told him. “Now is the time for honesty. From both of us. Close your eyes.”
He gave me a funny look and I huffed in annoyance, rolling my eyes. “Just do it,” I ordered, and waited while he followed instructions.
“Now, I want you to answer my question, with the first thing that pops in your head. Don’t think about your answer. Don’t tell me what you think I, or anybody fucking else, wants to hear. Understand?
He shook his shoulders, loosening his muscles but he obeyed, then nodded he was ready.
I kept my eyes locked on his face. “What do you want?”
I left the question open ended and not specific. Not what do you want in a mate, or business, or even life. I wanted to hear every word that he wanted to tell me.
He didn’t hesitate, and just opened his mouth and let the words spill free. “I want to stay home and take care of our babies, while you go bake all kinds of wonderful, mouth-watering treats. I want to learn how to cook, so I can have a hot meal waiting for you when you come home. I want to watch cheesy eighties movies while you make fun of me, and point out all the inaccuracies. I want to laugh with you, and have you make me laugh. I want to make love to you, and I want you to fuck me so I can feel owned by you.” He opened his eyes, blinking in the harsh, fluorescent light.
“Wow.” I breathed because it had been nothing that I was expecting him to say, and everything I had ever needed to hear from him. “Okay.”
He tilted his head, his body vibrating with nerves I could tell he was trying to keep a tight rein on. “Okay, what?” Hesitancy clung to his words.
I waved a hand at him. “All of it. All of that. Okay.”
My greatest fear had always been giving up control of my entire life to another person, an alpha. Someone who would want to tell me what to do, to ask me to give up things that I needed like I needed air to breathe. Who would try to change me into someone I didn’t – couldn’t – be. I’d never wanted kids, because I’d never dreamed I’d find someone who would want to take on the roles that were traditionally an omega’s, so I could live out my dreams.
He shook his head, tapping the end of my nose with his finger. “You switch moods like the wind changes. I hope that’s all because of the pregnancy.”
I shot him a saucy look. “Yeah, don’t hold your breath on that one, just saying.”
