Page 141 of The Secrets of Jane: Reborn
I regret ever going to her.
All to find my sister, who I’m slowly accepting I may actually never see again, even if I survive this.
“Rasmus,” I say.
He growls. “No one fucking listens when I say I don’t want to be called that. Threats don’t work on you, because I’m realistically not going to kill you. Why do you press that boundary I’veclearlymade?”
I ignore him, because what I want to ask is deeper than any moniker's title. I’ll open up a piece of my heart, because I can feel death moving through these men, and I don’t know which side of that coin my fate rests on. “I can’t find Serena. At all. I can feel she is alive, but she is totally inaccessible. It’s like when I think I’m near her, she’s suddenly elsewhere. I’ve gonemadhunting her down. It’s… it’s why I’m here in the first place,” I slowly breathe out, the words like cleaning out tension in my body.I can admit this to him, because he knows the angry, destructive young man I used to be.
“It’s not failing, Soren, if someone is purposely hiding her. Which is what it sounds like,” he says with annoyance, like he hasn’t forgotten the use of his name.
Hope.
I hate that bittersweet bitch.
It’s something I’ve considered before, but I’d allow it to blow away as soon as it appeared. It would mean she’strulyinaccessible. “I always thought I’d findsomething.Use the Zenith and their network to man a hunt for Serena.”
I know that Cypress has given me no choice, and that I truly do trust Jane to find her, especially after proving herself in Ashfire—as long as I get her out. Perhaps it’s just impossible for me to uncurl my fingers that carry the responsibility of caring for my family.
It’s not in me totrulylet go.
“So, you’re giving it all to Jane,” he says with understanding, as if he just read me like how I read others.
The broken pieces of my soul are a little less jagged at that thought. “She feels likemine.Especially with my maskembedded in her. Her soulconnectsto me—“ I stop, feeling incredibly uncomfortable to let another have that information.
“I know,” he quickly replies. “I understand. You don’t need to say more.”
I don’t even know if our conversation accomplished anything, and yet it seemed to help. The longer my magic is exposed to Jane, especially with this mask on, the more it feels entirely wrong to consider her not in my life.
In that, I understand Anya.
That’s not a feeling you can ever forget, or move away from.
I rest my eyes at some point, finding peace in my duty here. I’m not even sure if I accomplished any sleep when my eyes shoot wide open as Ritter approaches us, along with Liam.
The captain of this ship stands in front of me, the man containingtruepirating energy; as if any offer of the right kind will sway him.
“It’s nearly time. When we can spot the tip of the volcano, we’ll anchor and get every one of you into the waters. On land, once you’re ready, light a blue flame. The bigger, the better,” he hands both Basilisk and I a small bag, the two of us still seated. “That’ll turn it blue long enough for me to spot it. We’ll know that means it’s time to ready the ship to leave. I’ll get close enough so the sirens won’t have to travel far to fetch you, and we’ll then ready the cannons.”
Cannons.
Something many have reported in ships further south in the summer trade lines. It’ll be interesting to see them used here, if they’re effective at all.
“And I double-confirmed with Melona,” Ritter says. “The water is our ally. The sirens will be infesting them, called from all over. They’ll be deep so they can’t be ensnared, and as soon as they feel one of us plunge below, they’ll grab us and use marrowkelp to get us back to the ship.”
I stare out at the men who are trying to listen, some elbowed awake; they’ll be formally briefed soon. When it’s time to get their orders, I want it to be with the poppy in their system, their blood runninghotwith murder.
“It’s time to get ready,” I say.
S O R E N
The moon is barely a sliver in the sky. Heavy clouds cover the stars, a rumbling in the distance that promises a storm. The ship sways more with taller swells. I’m up on deck, my armor fastened, my weapons sharpened, Jane’s blade at my thigh. My mask remains an extension of me, sensing out the peninsula just ahead. I can’t quite pinpoint the exact sensation, but it’s as ifrightahead contains a massive amount of energy.
And Jane is there.
Oh, her feisty, determined heart is so much clearer, as if I could reach out and touch her.
I’m so fucking ready to get her home.
