Page 4 of Reckless and Rooted
I knew deleting my actual socials would get me a call from my manager, Jeanette, who was already pissed at me for leaving with no notice.
I just don’t care.
“Oh, whew. Okay, well, maybe you don’t want to know what Zack said.”
I roll my eyes. “Well, now I do. I didn’t before you brought it up.”
“Well, he just posted a new picture of him and his new costar getting cozy.”
I cringe, thinking about how bad that must make me look. I used to be gaga for the guy. I really thought he was something special, and for the first time in my life, I felt like I was going to be able to get over my past by moving on with him.
Funny how even when you’re in the narrative, sometimes you can’t see what should have been so obvious.
“It’s fine, Erin. I don’t want to see him anymore.” Even though I was pretty sure I would have to deal with him at some point.
“I know, but…” Her voice softens, and I smile because I know she’s being discreet. She’s the only person who knows everything about me. “You need to talk to him.”
I nod and sigh. “I will. Just not yet.”
“Fine.” She clears her throat. “So how was that bar thing you went to last night? Did you see all your old friends that you’re threatening to replace me with?”
I sigh at her tone and laugh. “First of all, I’m not replacing you. And second, no. It wasn’t like what I expected.”
“Aw, I’m sorry.” She’s quiet for a minute before she says, “Did you happen to see…him?”
See, this was why she was my friend. Because I knew she wasn’t going to say his name and make me spiral like I felt I was going to whenever I heard it. “I did, actually.”
“You did? Tell me everything.”
I bite my lip as unexpected tears sting my eyes. “He didn’t even know who I was.”
I let that image of him run through my mind again and frown at the way his expression stayed completely blank. How could he not even recognize me? I mean, I had the wig on, but my face hasn’t changed that much.
“Aw, honey. Are you serious?” I hear the clinking of a glass and wish for a brief moment that I was back in California. The wistful part of me had thought that coming home would feel better…different. And it does feel different, but not in the way I expected.
“He just looked right over me like I was a stranger.”
“Well…” Erin clears her throat, and I know her no-nonsense tone is about to come through the phone. “You kind of are. It’s been twelve years. That’s a lifetime that’s passed between you two. I mean, you were a baby when you left.”
“I know.” But it doesn’t stop the sting from making my chest ache anymore.
“Listen, I have to go, but know I’m a phone call away whenever. Okay, babe?”
“Okay, thanks for checking in. And ignore Zack’s drama, okay?”
“You got it, babe.”
We hang up, and I lie there for a moment longer before the birds chirping outside my window tell me it’s time to get up and face the day, whether I like it or not.
3
felicity
“Something smells delicious.”I smile as I enter our small kitchen—the same one with red walls and honey-colored cabinets that greeted me every day of my childhood.
“Making some banana pancakes.” My dad grins over his shoulder at me, and my heart squeezes in my chest at the nostalgia that overwhelms me. “Just for my girl.”
“Thanks, Daddy.” I walk up to him, welcoming the side hug before turning to see my mom at the table, reading her morning paper like always. “What’s on the agenda today?”
