Page 60 of Space Balls: Houston, We Have Liftoff
“Why’s that?”
“We have several witnesses who came forward explaining how Rose only retaliated when the offender spat a racial slur at you.” He shakes his head in disgust. “In Texas, that’s considered a hate crime, and we take that very seriously.”
“Oh, ah, yes.” I have no idea what he’s talking about.
He must see my confusion. “After you were assaulted, the woman currently in custody called you a ‘spic.’”
My mouth drops open. Unfortunately having people comment on my darker skin isn’t new to me, but I’m surprised I didn’t hear it. My balls throb. Then again, maybe I’m not surprised.
“Your girlfriend here was nice enough to correct the woman on your Native American heritage and come to your defense in a very, uh”—he struggles to find the word—“unusualway.”
Rose grimaces, and the store manager laughs.
He drops her hand to hold it out to me. “You may not be a fellow Hispanic like me, but I won’t tolerate any racial slurs against my customers.”
I shake his hand. “Thank you.”
“Speaking of customers.” Rose reaches into her bra, pulling out a black credit card. “I’d like to pay for the current purchases of everyone in the store.”
He stares at her, his mouth open for a minute before clearing his throat. “That is very thoughtful of you, Rose, but it may cause a bit of a riot with everyone trying to get to the cashiers.”
“Oh.” Rose looks downcast for a moment before brightening again. “Then how about free coffee all day?” She thinks for a moment. “No riot, just happy, energized customers.”
Mr. Rodriguez beams. “Wonderful idea.” He turns to me, his eyes dimming as if he’s not all that impressed with what he’s seen of me thus far. “You have a very caring and smart woman here.”
I toss the bag of peas in the trash. “Yeah.” I feel weighed, measured, and severely lacking.
“Oh, we’re just friends,” Rose says.
Mr. Rodriguez’s eyes light up. “Really? Well in that case, I have a handsome son about your age.”
“No.”Rose points to the shopping bag I just grabbed from my 4Runner. “Leave those.”
After Rose politely thwarted Mr. Rodriguez’s matchmaking attempts, and I apologized to her for yelling, I drove Rose to Flynn’s house.
I glance down at the shopping bag with the headsets and back massager in my hand. “Why?”
“Because I have to take those home and wrap them. They’re for your family.”
“What?”
“I guess I got a bit excited when your nephews mentioned Christmas.” She laughs, but it doesn’t sound natural. “Silly, right?”
“I...”
“When I saw all the Christmas decorations in the store and people running around throwing things in their carts that were probably gifts for people, I got a little ahead of myself.” A look of panic flashes across her face, and she holds out the hand not grasping the llama pillow. “I mean, I know we’re not like that, but still, your family was really welcoming to me yesterday, and on the off chance that I do see them again…” She drops her hand and shrugs. “Well, I at least wanted to get them some Christmas presents.”
I stare at the bag I’m holding again, then over my shoulder at the large KitchenAid mixer box still in the back of my SUV.
“Your mom was complaining about her back last pole dance class, so I thought she’d like the massager. And when Matt went outside to clean up the turkey pot, your sister mentioned to your mom that she needs a mixer but doesn’t know whether to ask for that or the diamond studs she really wants this Christmas.”
Rose walks over to the and pats the box. “Brit had me download the Pinterest app.”
I snort.
“And I found this tutorial on it that shows you how to glitter-coat stuff. I was thinking I could go a step further and rig up my glitter room to refinish the mixer. Thought Brittany would appreciate the DIY of it.” She takes the bag out of my hands and places it next to the mixer box. “And these headphones are the same ones I use when gaming. They’re really good. I thought your nephews and I could exchange usernames and game together.”
“And the beer brewing kit?”
