Page 76 of Vows in Sin
“Well,” he cringes. “A few medics were crashing in the tent last night.”
“Spit it out,” Tabby demands. “And?’
“You talk in your sleep.” Budgie winces, the bearer of bad news.
She stands so fast that she upsets her stool, knocking it over. She snaps off her gloves one at a time, tossing them in the trash. She storms away from the bed. “Unbelievable!”
I toss Budgie a look. “Fuel to the fire?” I get up to follow Tabby.
“What? She asked.” He says with a shrug. “I tell it like it is.” He calls after us. “Hey, am I done?”
She’s out from under the tent, standing on the edge of the woods. The light babble of a creek breaks the silence. I stand, facing her, giving her space to speak.
Her arms are crossed over her chest. She stares out over the forest, avoiding my eye. Finally, she speaks. “I’m not an idiot. I knew right when you came off that plane and shook hands, something was up between you two.”
I think back to that day. The curious look she gave us, asking us if we’d met before. “You said as much.”
We both denied it. Denied her. Lied to her.
She turns to me. “I gave you both a chance to tell me.” She gives a pained laugh. “Then you both miss dinner? Come on.” She rolls her eyes, muttering, “Tell Seraphina she might want to take that dress to get it drycleaned by the way.”
“I should have told you. I wanted to tell you. We wanted to. We were waiting for the right time.”
“The right time was when we stepped off that plane and the two of you shook hands! You made me look stupid. Everyone here knew exactly what was going on. But because you hadn’t told me,I respected your boundary. I pretended I didn’t know. I waited. Like aloyalperson would.”
She throws the word at me. It strikes like a grenade.
“I’m sorry.”
“And neither of you. Said anything.”
“I should have told you.”
She eyes me. “How long has this been going on?”
“We only made the connection when I came here.”
“How long?” she asks again.
“Does it matter?” I reach a hand out for her. “I’m sorry I hurt you.”
“I’m hurt because you didn’t tell me.” She pulls away. “But yeah, it’s gross and weird. And ugh—could you have chosen, literally,anyoneelse?”
It didn’t feel like a choice. More like a gravitational pull. I don’t share that. “I let you down. I should have told you right away.”
She gave us a chance. To come clean. To make things right. I’m so ashamed I can’t look at her. I glance down at my rejected hand, tracing the letters of her name.
I should have come clean earlier. I didn’t for Seraphina’s sake.
The first of many decisions I would have to make, where I would have to choose between the two of them if I stay with Seraphina.
And that’s the crux of the issue. The heart of the beast.
I won’t move on. Hell, if I were going to move on from Jane, I would have by now. It wasn’t a matter of someone coming along to shake me out of my cage.
It was a matter of fate. Of her. Seraphina.
I’ll be back to my old life. My leather chair. My microwaved dinner. My footie matches. But I’ll still have Tabby on the other end of the phone, calling the plays, yelling at the refs.
