Page 100 of Seducing the Sorcerer
“You’d have taken her from me by force?” Fenn asked. Because he had to know.
Morgrim looked up, fast. “No!” He paused. “But I’d never have had to. Because you just tried to give her to me freely. So, I know you’d have sacrificed her for the greater good. Wouldn’t you?”
“Aye,” Fenn said, heavily. Even now he didn’t like to think of it. “Would’ve broken my heart but I’d have done it.” He took a deep breath. “And you’d have sacrificed your magic, wouldn’t you? If it had been the other way around?”
“Yes.”
“Even if it broke your heart? Even if it meant you’d be without magic forever?”
“Of course.” There was no hesitation in Morgrim’s voice.
“Aye.” Fenn nodded. “You would. That’s why I can forgive you. Didn’t ask me to do anything you wouldn’t have done yourself. Did you?”
“No.” Morgrim’s gaze met his as if he were making a promise. “And I never would.”
“Aye. You’re a hard bastard sometimes, but you’re no hypocrite.”
Morgrim nodded once, and cocked his head slightly. “Was that almost a compliment?”
Fenn grinned. “It was.” He paused. Something was stirring in the back of his mind; a slow realisation of something important. He didn’t quite have it, but it was coming. He added, “While we’re here, I got something else to say: don’t go giving up on your magic, eh? Because you’ll get it back.”
Morgrim picked up another pine needle, stared at it. “I don’t think so. It’s been two years. Two years.” His tone was bleak.
Fenn took the pine needle from him and tossed it away. It suddenly seemed very important to hold Morgrim’s hand.
“Listen, petal, you say you like plain speaking so I’ll give it to you plain: you’re giving up too easy. No, you listen to me. I don’t doubt you been trying as hard as you can to get it back. In fact, you probably been trying too hard. How many breaks you give yourself, eh? How often do you go riding if I’m not there and Aramella don’t make you? I know what’s been at stake, but you can’t bully yourself into getting it back.
“Now, me, I searched...well, didn’t know it was magic I was looking for. Didn’t know it was you. All this time I thought it was horses. But I searched for more than twenty years. And I know our situations are different. A whole country ain’t relying on me. But what I’m saying is I know it ain’t easy. It’s a hard, boring, bitter struggle and it grinds you down something cruel. But two years is nothing, really. Not in the grand scheme of things. You see what I’m saying?”
“You put me to shame, Fenn.”
“That ain’t what I meant!”
“No, I’m agreeing.” Morgrim put his free hand on top of Fenn’s. “You did so much more than me. You took to the roads to search, did any job you could get. You went hungry. But you never stopped looking. You never gave up.”
Fenn shook his head. “That’s where you’re wrong. I gave up plenty of times. Despaired plenty of times. Took work in a factory or a tollbooth or whatever because I was too tired to go on. Because you got to survive. And you got to rest. And have a bit of what you fancy if you can get it. In fact, you got to, so you can gather strength for the next bit of the search.”
“I do tend to over-work. It’s true. And I had despaired. I mustn’t.”
“No, you mustn’t,” Fenn said absently. He’d been distracted by a flash of understanding so bright it felt like a flare of magic. He added, quickly, “Because I know for a fact you got a little bit of magic left. I just worked it out.”
“But I haven’t.” Morgrim took his hand from Fenn’s and made a graceful gesture that ended with his right arm held out at an odd angle in front of him. “That should have made a light. But nothing. Nothing. It’s like I’m going through the motions, but nothing happens.”
“All the same. You still got magic. Want to know how I know?”
“You can feel it?”
Fenn paused, thinking back. “Reckon I have felt something. When we been getting down to it. But I ain’t sure because fucking you is magic too, in a different sort of way. It’s hard to tell it apart from the regular sort. But, no, the reason I know is the horse.”
“The horse?”
“Aye. Old Squab. You said I didn’t come to you by chance and you’re right. I was brought. Because you were calling.”
“But I wasn’t.”
“Says you.”
Morgrim frowned. “If I’d tried to work a summoning, I’d tell you. But I didn’t.”
