Page 12 of Between the Shady Groves
Are you still alive?
She couldn’t tell whether he was worried or not. He was probably so busy, he barely noticed she was gone.
A nagging voice said that she wasn’t being very considerate.
She wanted to answer back that he hadn’t been very considerate for a really long time. But the longer she walked, the more clearly she heard that voice. She would hate it if Cannon had done this to her. She wouldbe frantic if she didn’t know where he was and if he wasn’t answering her texts. Frantic and furious when she found out that he was actually okay, reading her texts, and just dismissing her out of hand.
Why had she done this to him? She was a terrible person. Only terrible people made their loved ones worry like this.
That was assuming that Cannon was worried. But what she knew of him indicated that he probably wasn’t worried, unless it had to do with his business. Still, by the time she’d walked a mile and a half and turned around, she felt guilty enough to pull her phone out of her pocket and send him a text.
I’m fine. Keep working.
Maybe that was a little bit of sarcasm. Maybe that was a little bit of her bitterness and anger coming out. But in a text, they would just be words, not dripping with eye rolls and a you-never-pay-attention-to-me, you-really-don’t-care-about-me, I-feel-lost-in-this-marriage-like-I-don’t-matter kind of attitude.
Her phone buzzed almost immediately.
Where are you?
She bit her lip. She hadn’t wanted to start a conversation, she just felt guilty about him worrying about whether or not she was alive or dead.
She walked another half mile before she decided that she probably ought to answer him. As much as she didn’t want to.
Don’t worry about it. I’m fine. Didn’t you see my note?
I saw it, but it didn’t say where you were. Where are you?
She hadn’t even gotten three steps in before his answer came back.
She didn’t know her husband could text that fast.
Was he going to ask until she answered?
She pressed her lips together and then figured it wouldn’t hurt. It wasn’t like she was hiding from him. She just…didn’t feel like he cared, and she supposed that since he’d asked at least five times where she was, maybe he did care a little. And she could hardly complain that he didn’t care if she wouldn’t answer his question.
Raspberry Ridge, staying at my mom’s bakery. I think I might open it again.
She looked at that one for a bit before she hit send. After all, that was more information than she had intended to give him.
Come home. We can open a bakery in Cincinnati.
She had never, in all the years of marriage, done what she was about to do right now.
She typed two letters.
No.
Anytime he had expressly asked her to do something, she always replied with yes. She had made it her mission to say yes to her husband for everything that she could. Her husband loved Jesus, and he loved her as well, and she knew he would never ask her to do anything that was wrong or immoral. He’d asked her to do plenty of things that she didn’t want to at times, but because he was her husband, and because she had determined that she would always say yes to him, she’d done them. And she hadn’t complained.
And he hadn’t thanked her.
She wasn’t even sure he’d noticed.
Well, he might be surprised at her answer, and then again, he might not. She wasn’t sure, and she supposed it didn’t matter. She had no intention of going back.
But wasn’t that what she was supposed to do as a submissive, obedient wife? Just because she’d left him didn’t mean that she wasn’t supposed to follow the Bible’s command.
She wanted to kick that thought out of her head. She also wanted toargue that he had not been a biblical husband and had not loved her as Christ loved the church and gave himself for it. He also had not dwelt with her according to knowledge, because he had made no effort to find out what she needed after her mother’s death or after losing the babies. But there was no qualification on her command. It didn’t say that she was to obey and be submissive as long as her husband treated her well. Or as long as her husband upheld his end of the bargain, or as long as her husband did anything. There was no “as long as her husband” in the Bible. The command was just that. A command…
