Page 78 of Best Friends
“We had a major panic attack the first time,” I explain. “I had to do it. Malcolm was convinced he’d accidentally chop an arm off.”
Malcolm grimaces. “I didn’t want to chance it. But C. was brave and he did it. No limbs were lost, thank goodness.”
We eat lunch while passing Jamie around, and I’m struck by how normal this feels. How right. A month ago, I was worried about everything—whether I’d be a good parent, whether Malcolm and I could handle this together, whether having a baby would change everything between us.
It’s changed things, but not in a bad way. If anything, watching Malcolm with Jamie has only made me love him more. If that’s even possible. He gets up for the 3:00 a.m. feedings so I can rest. He helps with bath time and feedings. And he does it all with a smile. I’m still not sure how I got so lucky, but lately, I’ve stopped questioning my luck. I just embrace it. Turns out, I’m a lot happier that way.
“So,” Cheyenne says eventually, bouncing Jamie gently as he starts to get fussy. “When are you planning to come back to work? I miss you, plus, everyone’s been asking.”
I roll my eyes. “Yeah, I’m sure Harlan misses me terribly.”
Malcolm snorts a laugh. “He misses having you around so he can give you a hard time.”
“Well, Harlan’s just a jerk. He can go to you know where. But everyone else is asking.” She smiles. “So, when are you coming back?”
It’s a question I’ve been mulling. “I don’t know,” I say honestly. “Originally I was thinking I’d just take four weeks after Jamie was born.”
“But now?” Malcolm prompts gently.
I look at Jamie, who’s now calm again in Cheyenne’s arms, his eyes starting to drift closed. “Now I don’t want to leave him. Not yet. I think I’ll take the other four weeks too.”
There. I said it. I’ve wrestled with wanting to be home and also wanting to work. But I’ve come to the conclusion that work will wait, while Jamie will change every single day. I don’t want to throw that time away.
Cheyenne smiles. “I don’t blame you. This is a special time with your baby. Why not take the full eight weeks?”
I sigh. “It’s weird because, before Jamie was born, I was already planning my return to work, worried about losing my edge. I thought I’d be climbing the walls after a few weeks at home. Instead, I can’t imagine being anywhere else. I still love my job and want to go back, but I also want to spend this precious time with Jamie.”
“I think that’s great,” Malcolm says softly. “Whatever you want to do is fine with me. You could quit completely and I’d be fine with it.”
I grimace. “I don’t want to quit my job. I love my job. But I’m also loving being home with Jamie for now.”
“That’s why they give omegas time to be with the babies.” Malcolm shrugs. “Bonding is important.”
I grin sheepishly. “Did either of you ever think I’d want to stay home longer with the baby?”
“I thought you might,” Cheyenne says with a smile. “My sister said the same thing after her first. She was so career-focused before, and then suddenly all she wanted was to spend every minute with the baby.”
“I’m not quitting my job,” I say firmly. “But I want to spend this time with Jamie while he’s so little. Plus, it’s paid leave. I’d be a fool not to take advantage of that.”
“I’m glad you made your decision.” Malcolm reaches over and takes my hand. “I know you’ve been struggling with it.”
“It helps that you’re supportive, Malc.” I smile.
“Of course, C.” He kisses my knuckles. “I’m always going to support you.”
“Awww.” Cheyenne sighs. “You two are adorable.”
My cheeks warm. “Can you be adorable when you’re covered in baby spit-up twenty-four-seven?”
She grins. “Yes.”
“Speaking of which,” Malcolm points to the shoulder of my shirt. “Jamie left you a gift a bit ago.”
I look down at my shirt, which does indeed have a suspicious wet spot on the shoulder. “When did that happen?”
“He nailed you about ten minutes ago,” Malcolm says. “When you were holding him so Chey could eat.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” I grumble, dabbing at the spot with a burp cloth. “I would have changed my shirt.”
