Page 6 of Greater than the Heart
When Jax chuckled, taking Ford’s hand to kiss it, he sighed. The comfort and love he felt from both of the men in his life were nothing he ever thought he’d experience. It was truly a blessing.
“You seem to forget we have a son,” Jax reminded, which made Ford laugh.
On the surface, it was weird to have adopted Kincade, but it had made them a family no one could tear apart.
It was why Ford had done all that research when he came up with the idea in the first place. Hisformerfriend, Robin Zacks, had researched it in more detail for him, and when it turned out to be a viable alternative, Ford was psyched about the possibilities.
He was so happy Jax and Cade had accepted the alternative willingly, especially in light of the news he’d received from the doctor. Ford had the comfort of knowing if anything happened to him, the men he loved would live a good life.
There was a knock on the door and a soft voice they both loved to hear. “Guys, can I come in? Sela’s packing up Carlie’s things, and they need to get home by nine. Can I shower with you, or would you…?”
“Get in here, sweetheart,” Ford ordered.
Cade slipped into the bathroom in his black Speedo. After he quickly relieved himself in the toilet, he got into the shower with the two of them and stood under the rainfall showerhead.
“You feel better, Bix?” Cade asked as he shampooed his hair.
Ford looked at Jax and cocked an eyebrow. There would be time for bad news, but not yet. He just wanted one more night of denial.
“He wanted a dog so badly when we were kids that he actually stole a neighbor’s dog. Unfortunately, it was a guard dog, but Branny coaxed it home with him by breaking off bits of steakfrom dinner the previous night. Once he got it home, it went insane when he locked it in the backyard.
“We couldn’t even get outtothe backyard to open the gate to release it because it was nearly rabid at being confined in a strange place. Gerald, the gardener, went outside the gate and opened it with a coat hanger.
After the dog took off, Neil sent Branny out to the yard to clean up the poo. I felt bad for him, so I tried to help. The twins were three and came outside with us, and they got dog crap all over their shoes before they went back into the house. Much as I tried to stop it, Bran got a switching over that one. It made me sick, but Neil… Well, let’s not… Dinner was incredible,” Sela told them.
Her story revealed more than Ford wanted to share, but he supposed she was entitled to tell it, even if he didn’t enjoy the memories.
Kincade cleared his throat as he steepled his fingers in front of his face. “Why does Ford hate Christmas Day? He loves Christmas Eve, but he hates Christmas Day. Hell, why does he love Christmas Eve?”
Ford remembered an IOU he’d never lived up to, but he supposed it was time.
Sela smiled as she took Ford’s hand, gently holding it between both of hers as she used to do when he was a boy and got into his parents’ bad graces. “On Christmas Eve, our parents went to parties in our neighborhood and left the two of us home alone. Well, they had a babysitter for the twins, but we got to play games and watch Christmas movies together. Cook made hot chocolate and cookies for us, and we got to spend our time upstairs in the attic talking about our Christmas wishes. It was so wonderful,” Sela explained wistfully.
Ford squeezed her hand and added, “Yes, it was wonderful to have that night for just us because then on Christmas Day, ourparents trotted us from one end of Long Island to another, and we weren’t allowed to speak. We had to be perfect, Sela and me. The twins stayed home again with the nanny, but we had to go with Neil and Alicia, pretending to be the perfect little family. If anything happened to reflect badly on our parents, whether it was our fault or not, our Christmas gifts were given to charity without us knowing what they were. It seemed something happened every year, didn’t it Sela?”
His sister smiled and dried her eyes with a napkin. “Branny, many of those years there were only empty boxes under the tree. Our parents didn’t always have money to support the lifestyle they tried to live, as I came to learn later, so they’d wrap empty boxes for you and me. We were old enough to be manipulated into believing we’d done something wrong so they could take back our gifts, but they had to have something for the twins who were little. They were the worst possible role models,” Sela surmised as Ford looked over to see Carlotta dozing off.
Ford glanced at the lovely watch his sister had given him as a wedding gift and smiled. “Sela, let’s get her out to the car. She needs to be in bed.”
Jax hopped up. “I’ll follow you home and carry her inside, along with her suitcase. Ford, you and Cade can clear the table and discuss logistics for tomorrow.”
Of course, Ford wanted to slap him for saying it in front of Cade and his sister, but in the end, he knew Jackson was right. It wasn’t fair to hide the truth from Cade.
He saw Cade’s head pop up, but he didn’t say anything, so after they kissed Sela and Carlotta goodbye, Ford led Cade into the house and back to the dining room.
“Let’s get this cleaned up while I tell you something which isn’t necessarily bad. I went to the doctor, as you know, and had blood work and a sonogram performed. Seems I have a nodule, or acyst, on my left testicle. I’m having outpatient surgery tomorrow, and I really…” he got out before he broke down.
Cade’s arms surrounded him as he was ushered to a chair. “Wait, wait, we don’t know anything yet, Bix. No, I refuse to think the worst. We’ve only been together for a year, and I know that’s not nearly long enough, so let’s think about positive things. What’s the best-case scenario?”
Ford sniffed and looked at him. “I hoped it was a hernia or something of the sort, but Dr. Imani doesn’t think that’s what it is, Kincade. It might be a benign growth, but they won’t know until they perform the surgery.”
Cade took in the information and nodded. “Okay, then there’s no reason to worry yet, right?”
“Worst case, it’s malignant, and it’s spread. Honestly, if I only lose a ball, I’ll be grateful. We never even discussed having kids,” Ford told Cade.
“Kids? You’ve got one, Daddy.” Cade touched his chest and grinned. Ford knew he was trying to alleviate the tension, but it wasn’t working.
“No, Kincade, I’m serious. I’d like to have my sperm frozen before I die. If it’s the worst case, I’d like it if you and Jax would use my sperm to have a baby you’d raise together. I’d be honored,” Ford told him.
