Page 21 of Greater than the Heart
As he looked around, it reminded him of the locker room at the stadium he’d seen once when Jax was still playing. The memorymade him smile, remembering when Jax was the warrior on the field, and he wondered if the big man missed the gridiron.
After he was changed, he walked out to the pool to see Carlotta on Ashton’s shoulders as Cade served the ball to them, Jax batting it down every time. The huge grin on his face revealed everything Ford needed to know. The man didn’t care about his old life. He was ready for their future.
The first of March would be a day Ford Hayes-Thomas-Delacroix would never forget. They were at the doctor’s office with Sela, their surrogate, and she kept yelling, “By my head, dammit!”
The doctor was doing an intravaginal ultrasound to see how many babies there were, and the three of them kept wandering down to the dark side, as Ford thought about it. He definitely didn’t want to see his sister’s hinterlands, but the doctor was there…
“Okay, guys, look at the screen,” Dr. Lois Hu, the fertility specialist they’d used, instructed.
They all looked at the screen, and Ford had no idea what the hell he was seeing. He glanced next to him in time to see Jax and Cade were equally perplexed, which gave him some comfort.
“Here,” she circled three different things on the screen with her finger, “are three distinct amniotic sacks. Here’re the heartbeats.” She hit something on the keyboard in front of her which came alive with sounds that mimicked a herd of horses.
Triplets? As he looked at his husbands, Jax was entirely sure they could handle anything that came their way. If they wereblessed with three babies, they’d rise to the occasion, he had no doubt.
The three of them sat in the waiting room of the hospital, yet again. Sela had started to bleed, and she was still in the first trimester, so it seemed as if she’d miscarried. Ford studied his husbands. “Do we give up or try again?”
Cade, who was usually the most optimistic of the three of them, turned toward him, his face wet with tears. “I don’t think it’s meant for us to have our own children, Branford. I think this is God’s way of letting us know we’re not worthy.”
“Bullshit,” Jax blurted out. Ford turned in Jax’s direction, deducing the man wasn’t happy with Cade’s statement.
“What? You think three fags together deserve to be blessed with kids? How the fuck would we ever explain it to them? ‘Oh, we weren’t content with just two of us, so we had three of us so we’d never get bored and decide to cheat like so many fags do.”Cade’s response was harsh.
Ford couldn’t help himself when he slapped Cade’s face. Jax immediately wrapped Ford in his arms. It was a horrible thing to do, but he refused to listen to such vile filth. If God hated gay people, the deity would have taken Ford out a long time ago, he was certain.
“Stop it!” Jax hissed at both of them.
Cade was holding the side of his face as he pulled his legs up to his chest and curled into a ball. Never in his life had Branford ever struck another person in anger, as far as he could remember. Why he’d hit Cade wasn’t anything he couldcomprehend, except he was so worried about not only losing the babies but maybe his sister. Still, however, his actions were indefensible.
“Oh, God, I’m so fucking sorry,” Ford gasped as he crumbled into Jax’s strong embrace.
“Baby, tensions are high, but we don’t hit each other no matter how frustrated we get with circumstances. Go apologize, and if you ever do it again, Branford, I won’t be happy.” Jax released him.
Ford hurried to Cade, kneeling in front of the man before placing his head on Cade’s knee, begging for forgiveness. “I’m so sorry, sweetheart. I… I just… I have no excuse. I’m so very sorry. I swear I’ll leave if you want. I’ll never, ever, lay a hand on you again, Kincade,” Ford sobbed, unable to believe his own behavior.
He wasn’t one to ever act out physically. He had no idea what had come over him to take out his worry on Cade.
Before Cade could accept his apology, Dr. Hu came into the waiting room. “Sela is fine, and two of the fetuses are doing well. The smallest of the three wasn’t viable, and Sela’s body shed it to be able to provide the best environment for the other two. I’m sorry the fetus was lost, but the body knows things we don’t. I’m going to keep her overnight so I can monitor her and ensure the bleeding stops.
“Just so you know, some women continue to have their menstrual cycles throughout their pregnancies, which is why we get the stupid television shows about women not knowing they’re pregnant. I’m going to do an ultrasound in the morning, so if you show up around nine, you can hear the strong heartbeats of your babies. You should go home and go to bed. I’d rather you see Sela in the morning when you’re all calm.” The doctor studied Cade’s face, red with Ford’s handprint.
“Thank you, Dr. Hu,” Jax told her as he gathered the other two to leave. Ford felt about a foot tall because of his earlier behavior. He wasn’t sure how, but he’d make it up to Cade.
The next morning, Ford woke when a hand touched his shoulder. He opened his eyes to see Cade sitting on the side of the bed with a tray in his hands. “I brought you coffee and homemade muffins. Connor made them, but I helped a little.
“Anyway, I’m sorry, Ford. I shouldn’t have lashed out as I did last night. I was heartbroken over the thought Sela might lose the babies, and I spoke without thinking about how you two were feeling. I’m sorry.”
Ford felt lower than a toadstool. “No, Kincade, I was the one who was wrong. I don’t care what you say to me or about me, it’s never okay for me to strike you. I should have had more self-control, and I’ve resolved myself to go talk to someone so I can handle things better. It’s never okay for one of us to hit the other.” Ford’s guilt consumed him.
“I’m gonna beat both your asses if nobody brought me coffee and muffins.” Jax let go of a loud yawn, sitting up and scooting over to his regular side of the bed so Cade could join them in the middle. The night before, Jax had insisted he’d sleep in the middle because Cade didn’t want to sleep with them, which broke Ford’s heart. He’d hurt one of the two people he never wanted to hurt in his whole life, and it made him sick.
Cade giggled as he climbed in between them and placed the tray over his lap so each man could reach his coffee and the basket of berry muffins.
Just as Ford was chewing, there was a knock on the bedroom door. They looked at each other and shrugged, so Jax called, “Come in.”
Carlotta came flying into the room and crawled up onto the bed with them. Thankfully, they were all dressed. “Can I go see Mamma today?”
After Sela had called Ford, he’d hurried over to her house to take her to the hospital. Cade had been at the club working late, and Jax was finishing up at the Center, so he’d called Winnie to come take care of Carlotta so he could get Sela checked out.
