Page 180 of The Valiant Knight
Sadly, D’Artangnan had been more than enough. He’d been everything.
If Graham could go back in time, he would do everything differently. He would have told him that he would finish up his time and follow him.
He would have told him to wait for him in America, and he would come.
He would have begged him to wait for him until he could be free of duty.
God.
Why didn’t he do the right thing?
A more mature man would have seen that six months in a long-distance relationship with your soulmate was better than the rest of your life without them.
Yeah, he hated himself.
Without.
A.
Doubt.
Every day, all he thought about was D’Artangnan and if he ever loved again.
Was he somewhere right now having a good day with his lover?
His husband?
His new soulmate?
Was he laughing and so happy that Graham was never even a thought in his mind?
Probably.
And he deserved that.
His stubbornness was his downfall, and he would never forgive himself for that. He’d never forgive himself for allowing a man he loved more than himself to slip through his fingers.
He was cursed.
At the time, he’d believed he was right, and he wasn’t. He was selfish to assume that he deserved to force him to stay there, and that he owed him that.
Graham was selfish to demand when he now knew that love was give and take.
Equally.
All Graham could hope was that wherever D’Artangnan was, he was happy because he’d been a saint. Graham was unworthy of the man.
And the bottom line was that Graham had been the bad one.
Now, he’d spend what was left of his life mourning what he’d had.
Sitting down at the bar, he ordered a drink, and slowly sipped it.
This was his downfall, and he knew it.
Graham was in a bad place, so of course, he was going to degrade himself the only way he knew how.
He was meeting a man.
