Page 120 of Unmasking Love
Her insides flutter and my balls tighten. I drop my head to her shoulder and I mouth my words onto her flushed skin and pull her body close to mine as I empty everything I am into her.
I pull out of her but won’t let our connection fray. I keep her tucked into my side and her hand falls to my chest again. My heart beats wildly and while she basks in the afterglow I cower because it feels like I have a secret bigger than my medical history.
I love her and I can’t tell her.
Instead I say, “Let’s skip the visit with your mom tomorrow.” I can tell her I love her in other ways, without using the words. I can show her with my actions that I would be lost without her. I can demonstrate that I listen and understand what she’s saying, even if she doesn’t say it out loud.
But as she blinks up at me and her smile grows wide I worry my secret love for her will become hard for me to keep under wraps.
Chapter 35
Harper
November, December, January, February
TheFloridatripwrappedup with a win. Aiden flew home with the team and I flew home with the girls that same night. We climbed into bed in the early hours of the morning, we cuddled together and went to sleep.
When we woke up the next morning Aiden left for his bike ride and I stayed in bed and got another hour of sleep.
It was the first time since I’d moved in that we hadn’t fooled around at all.
And it’s happened a few more times since. Which is what I just shared with Wes over the bluetooth in my car as I drive to the game.
“Oh poor you missing a night of steaming hot sex with a professional athlete.” Wes pouts sarcastically. “Can you hear me playing the world's smallest violin?”
“Shut up! I’m not complaining. It’s just different I guess. Every night we were together since November included some sort of sex. And when he’s on the road we still get each other off.”
“I honestly can’t handle you right now.”
“But Wes, listen. Something is off. He’s been different lately.”
“Different how?” Wes asks, turning into the supportive friend I know him to be.
“I dunno, quieter?” I think back over the last three weeks. “No, it’s not that he’s quieter exactly, more like he’s holding something back.”
“He got the starting gig three weeks ago right?”
“Yeah.” I considered this too but he was already contributing so much to the team, yeah there is a little more recovery time with the trainers and physical therapists but it’s not all that different.
“Maybe he’s just stressed about that.”
“No, he doesn’t seem stressed.” And I mean that. Aiden has been energetic and positive. He asks me questions about my day, he shares bits and pieces of hockey but I think he likes not talking about it all night long. We started watching Supernatural together when I told him how much I loved the show. I still haven’t told him I named my oven after Jared P though.
“He’s not stressed, he’s not withdrawn, so obviouslyyouare the problem.” Wes states matter of factly and I almost drive off the road.
“What the hell does that mean Wes?”
“I’m simply trying to make you hear how ridiculous your inner thoughts are right now.”
“Shut up Wes.”
“I’ll pay you $100,000 if you can tell me that wasn’t what you were thinking.”
“Shut up Wes.” I grumble quietly. He’s right. And he knows it. I am blaming myself for whatever this disconnect is between me and Aiden. I pull into the parking lot and drive to the space the attendant indicates. Before I get out of the car I sit with my head pressed into the head rest.
“Listen, Harper. Aiden is different. He’s not any of your past boyfriends. He’s yourmanfriend,remember?” I let out a reluctant chuckle when Wes pauses. “Just talk to him. Ask him. Figure it out.”
“I don’t know if I can.” I admit in a whisper.
