Page 95 of Only the Small Bones
William grinned, bringing his fingers to my mouth. I licked up the drops of cum there.
He turned for the shower door, giving me the perfect view of his tattoo. It was the first time I could look at it without having to hide how much it meant to me.
“Wait,” I said, catching him before he stepped in. I smoothed my fingers over the trees, the wildflowers, and finally the bones. “Seeing this made me angrier with you, but only because it was harder to be mean to you after. I didn’t want to forgive you, or feel your pain, but you made it impossible not to.”
“So you did watch me that night.” He said almost to himself, looking over his shoulder.
“Yes.” My skin heated thinking back to the night I watched him jerk off in his bathroom. I’d only seen the lower half. His shirt covered most of it, but it was enough.
“How did seeing me fuck my fist make you feel, Asher?”
I thought back to that moment outside his door, hearing him groan as he came over the sink.
“Confused.”
“Why?”
“I’d never felt turned on before. Never felt anything close to that.” Up to that point, I’d always fought against anything that felt even a little good. I’d felt something other than shame that night—or something else in addition to the shame. I kissed his shoulder, spreading my hand over his plea to Gargantuan.
“We were just Small Bones back then.” His voice sounded scratchy, like mine. “Sometimes I think we still are.”
I nodded, but he couldn’t see me. “You once asked me who you were to me. Do you remember?”
“Yes,” he breathed as I kissed a path from one shoulder to the next.
“What is this?”he’d whispered.“This thing between us. Who am I to you?”
I pulled him around, finding hope and love in his eyes, hoping he found the same in mine. “You’reeverythingto me, William. You always have been.”
William led me into the shower and showed me what he meant by “treasured.” He started with my hair, tilting my head back to massage the shampoo in, my curls springing back to life. I moaned while he took his time soaping up my body, fingers pressing into my tense muscles as he skipped over my cock to work his way down to my toes. Water hit us from left and right, steam surrounding us.
“Close your eyes,” he whispered, his fingers stroking across my hips to my dick. “Block everything else out. It’s just us here.” His words helped with the panic setting in.
I felt for the wall behind me, leaning back and breathing steadily until the past faded away and only the present remained.
“That’s it,” William praised from down on his knees. “How does this feel?” He circled my rim with a soapy finger. I searched for the right words to say.
“Like I’m at the beginning of something.”
“Your adrenaline is slightly elevated. And now?” he asked, stroking my cock. My stomach muscles clenched, my fingers scraping along the tile at my back.
“Like… like I’m speeding, like I’m about to crash.” My breaths started coming faster.
“That’s the dopamine rush,” he said. “And now?” His hand still moved up and down, but his thumb swiped over my rim and my tip now too. My legs shook.
“I’m gonna co—”
William stopped, and I sucked in a breath, my eyes snapping open.
“Not yet. I want to be inside you when the oxytocin kicks in,” he whispered. “Turn around.”
I complied, feeling hot and unsteady, hungrier and more desperate than I had before.
“Is it okay if I touch you here?” He squeezed my clenched ass cheeks, but I knew he meant the place in between them.
“Yes.” I closed my eyes, resting my forehead against the wall and trying to relax. William spread me open and paused. I couldn’t see his face, couldn’t hear him move or breathe, but I winced when his hands tightened on me. He made a wounded sound then, bringing back the sting in my eyes.
“It’s not your fault.” My voice sounded thin, weak. “It’s not either of our faults.” The reminder was for the both of us.
