Page 132 of The Christmas Invitation
‘He’ll be fine,’ Clara assured me, giving my arm a pat. ‘Come along in before we let all the warm air out.’
Back in the drawing room, there was a palpable lightening of the atmosphere.
Zelda and Tottie returned from putting Teddy to bed and reported that he’d fallen asleep instantly.
Sybil said, ‘Teddy’s such a lovely little boy. I remember Mark at that age …’ But then her face clouded over and she looked anxious again. During the course of the evening I’d become sure she had something on her mind, but I’d no idea what.
River went to sit next to her, with Tottie on her other side, and soon the three of them were deep in horticultural conversation. At least, I hoped it was, because I caught the words ‘cross-pollination’ and ‘hot beds’.
Zelda suggested she, Lex and I go into the morning room to watch a rom com, calledWhile You Were Sleeping, which I loved. All those crossed wires reminded me a bit of our own complicated Lex/me/Zelda/Mark/Rollo/Flora situation.
On my way to bed later I popped my head into the drawing room to say goodnight and found River, Sybil, Clara and Henry playing mah-jong. Tottie was sitting nearby, knitting a rainbow-striped scarf.
It was a cosy scene, with Lass and Wisty curled up together under the table.
‘Pansy’s just been out,’ I told Sybil, pushing the little dog into the room, even though she obviously wanted to stay with me. I had to harden my heart.
‘Fine, dear,’ said Sybil absently, then she smiled triumphantly at River and said something that sounded like, ‘Pung!’
When I woke up next morning, I thought about Pansy and wondered if I could beg Sybilnotto sell her to someone else after all … even offer her more, if she could wait for the money?
The light filtering in was the soft white kind bounced by snow and it still felt quite early. Was Lex awake yet? Was hethinking about that kiss last night?Imight have been the one to initiate it, but he’d turned it into something deeper and … well, resistance was useless.
Of course, he’d been very kind to me since we’d had that talk in the car, but that kiss had travelled beyond mere kindness. I just wasn’t quite sure where to.
I told myself not to read too much into it: he might once have had feelings for me, but all that lay in the past, on the other side of the emotional chasm of his loss, grief and guilt.
My own feelings were confused. When we were students and I’d got over my crush, we’d been friendly, and because of Lisa I’d never let myself think of him in any other way.
But now, I was, and thatsowasn’t a good idea because, given the past, how could things ever work out between us? I needed to get a grip on myself before I lost my heart, though that wouldn’t be easy when we were living in the same house.
I turned my thoughts to Zelda, instead, whom I liked very much and who was so very different from her brother.
Her casual mothering reminded me so much of Mum: loving but always ready to leave the responsibility of raising a child to someone else. A cuckoo mother. It was just the way some women were.
Watching the film together last night had been fun: eating snacks from a kitchen raid and drinking home-made ginger beer, as if we’d escaped from an Enid Blyton novel.
Zelda had dragged Mark’s name into the conversation a couple of times and I wondered where that would go.Couldshe settle down in one place? And Mark – how constant was he likely to be?
But no, love at first sight is unmistakable … or, in this case, love after a long gap in sightings.
I turned on the pillow, releasing the faint fragrance of lavender, which I found very soothing, unlike Sybil’s unsettling perfume the previous night.
And then, quite suddenly, something connected in my head and I sat bolt upright, eyes wide.
Ihadn’tfirst noticed Sybil’s pervasive, unusual and strangely familiar scent at the Gathering at all. Instead it was ineradicably associated with the moment I’d nearly gone headlong over that precipice! No wonder I’d found the perfume unsettling.
But did that mean Ihadbeen pushed, and bySybil? I surely must be going mad if I thought Mark’s mother was a homicidal maniac! I mean, after we’d got to Underhill she’d been so kind, patching me up and then saying nice things about my joining the family, and then insinuating how much Mark liked me.
But of course, when she’d first known about our relationship she’d been horrified and looked afraid. Mark had been wary and angry, too, until I’d reassured them both that neither Mum nor I would be remotely interested in pursuing a claim on the estate.
Perhaps Sybil hadn’t really believed me and I’d still seemed to pose a threat? But then later, after seeing Mark and me together at the Gathering, she’d decided our marriage would solve the problem much more easily?
Unless she was completely mad, though, my theory seemed entirely unbelievable. Yet somehow, now, Ididbelieve it. I just didn’t know what to do about it.
I put my dressing gown on and padded across the landing to the bathroom, pausing for a moment to listen to the faint clack of typewriter keys. It was not that early, for Henry was already at work … and was that murmuring noise Clara dictating into her microphone?
When I went down, almost everyone else was eating breakfast or, in the case of Henry and Clara, a second breakfast.
