Page 98 of A Good Heart is Hard to Find
‘Tell her I’ll put her out, heart attack or no heart attack, if she tries!’ he said harshly.
Eddie appeared, looking slightly puzzled. ‘Louie wants her stuff,’ he said. ‘This it?’ He effortlessly hoisted up two large suitcases and went back in, followed by Reg carrying an assortment of smallerbags.
‘Don’t look now, but here comes what looks like the Ghost Grabbers,’ I said as another taxi drove up and disgorged two men of that incalculable age between greying and dust, and a slender white-haired woman wearing a gold-encrusted wedding sari in a shrieking shade of pink.
‘Spectrology Group, and I’m beginning to seriously doubt that this B&B thing was a good idea,’ Dante said. ‘Rosetta,if you need me for anything – desperately – I’ll be in the west wing! I’ll seeyoulater,’ he added to me, before retreating.
‘Yes, headmaster!’ I called after him, though I wasn’t sure he heard.Demonheadmaster would have been more appropriate.
‘Oh dear,’ Rosetta sighed, looking after his retreating back.
So did I, but not in a sisterly manner: it was well worth looking at in those trousers.
‘I hope … well, maybe this ghost-hunting theme wasn’t such a good idea after all? Why do all our guests look such total cranks? And I wouldn’t have had Mrs – Madame – Duval here if I’d known, because she’s been haunting poor Dante and it really wasn’t his fault at all,’ she said earnestly. ‘I mean, Emma had an affair with another man when he was away on an assignment, and she only went back whenhe dumped her! The reconciliation and the baby were entirely her idea.’
‘Oh? Her mother doesn’t seem to see it quite like that, does she? Though I suppose it’s understandable,’ I added thinking about it. ‘Poor woman!’
‘Poor Emma, too,’ Rosetta said, ‘because she was brought up on planchettes and the supernatural and then she went and fell in love with Dante, who doesn’t believe at all. Therewas this huge power struggle between Dante and her mother when they got married, which he won, but then Emma fell under the sway of this man her mother introduced her to, another medium, and—’
Dante stuck his head out of the front door again and bellowed: ‘Cass!’
‘Coming, master!’ I called sarcastically. ‘Can you manage all right, Rosetta? Eddie will have to carry their luggage up in relays,I’ve never seen so much for one weekend!’
‘Yes, you go if Dante needs you. Eddie will be down in a minute: he’s so strong and calm and wonderful, isn’t he?’ she said dreamily
‘Is he?’ I said doubtfully, wondering if she was on the pot, as it were, too. ‘I mean, yes heis, isn’t he? Brace yourself, here come the Spectral Spectators!’ and hurried off after Dante towards the lonely west wing carryingmy own unimpressive luggage.
He showed me to a monastic little newly whitewashed room, muttered something about work and made to leave. When I imperatively called him back he turned reluctantly.
‘A table.’
‘What?’
‘I need a table to work on. In the night. I’ve started a new book.’ I said in short, easy to understand sentences.
He gave me an evil look, but did come back hefting a small papiermâché desk a few minutes later, which although a trifle ornate seemed sturdy enough.
I thanked him.
‘The only thanks I want is for you to leave my property and putative ancestors out of any of your future mental dribblings,’ he said offensively, and went off, slamming the door to his study behind him.
I went straight after him and flung it open again so that it crashed satisfyingly againstthe panelling: ‘Istronglyobject to the use of the word “dribblings”. My thought processes are definitely more in the nature of a free-flowing river carrying all before it,’ I told him with emphasis before turning on my heel and marching back to my cell.
Behind me Dante muttered something which was fortunately inaudible, but it was a full five minutes before he closed his study door again: quietly.I was listening.
Charles would probably say that this weekend was in the nature of a penance for past misdeeds, and I should suffer in silence. But there might be some benefits, too, for at least over this weekend I would have lots of time to think aboutA Good Heartwhile I was haunting and soaking up the ambience. Who knew, maybe I would actually see Betsy, or some of the other colourful charactersreputed to infest the place?
After all the excitement I could havekilleda pizza, but did not think I was about to get one if it was left to Dante, who seemed to have forgotten the joy of food. But shortly I would sneak down to the King’s Arms to meet Francis and could eat something there.
I hung a couple of things up, set out my pallid palette of stage make-up for later, put my notes and thingson the desk, then went to offer my services to Rosetta for a while.
She was in the kitchen, distractedly rattling pots and pans.
‘This is all a big mistake,’ she moaned, wild-eyed. ‘It’s all very well managing a small hotel, but then I didn’t have to do everything myself, including unexpectedly cooking dinner for five guests!’
‘But I thought you weren’t providing meals? Send them down to thepub like Orla does with hers.’
She ran a nervous hand through her curly brown locks. ‘I thought that’s what they’d do, but Reg – Mr Bangs – says his wife is too prostrate to leave her room tonight.’
