Page 9 of Explorer's Revenge
“Mom wouldn’t like this,” he mutters, staring at me with wide eyes. “Why don’t we just go back and play a game?”
“No, that’s boring,” I scoff. “I want to get to the top and pretend I’m a superhero.” I glance up at the huge tower we are climbing. We found it a few days ago in the woods, and ever since, I knew I needed to climb it and feel that rush I always get when I do something stupid—something that usually ends up with me getting grounded.
Like last week when I took Dad’s car for a joyride around the block.
“I don’t like heights,” he mumbles.
“You don’t like anything,” I retort, still climbing with him slowly following behind.
When I get higher, I look down to see him hesitating about halfway up.
“Come on!” I yell, and as he goes to reach for the next bar, he slips.
“No!”
“No!” The horror-filled scream rips me from my dreams, and for a moment, I blink, wondering if it was from him in my dreams, but then it comes again. I’m the closest, so I get to my knees and crawl over to Aiyaret, gripping his hand.
“You’re okay, brother. You aren’t there. You’re here. Come back to us. It’s just a bad fucking memory. You’re safe. You’re okay.” His eyes slowly blink open, his body covered in sweat. “Shh . . .” I sense the others drawing closer, offering their support.
“Say it with me: You’re safe. You are with your family. She can’t hurt you anymore. Say it,” I demand, holding his face to force him to look at me.
“I’m safe with my family. She can’t hurt me,” he whispers shakily before he says it again, repeating the words until his voice is stronger. Once I’m sure the lingering fear is gone, I pull him in for a hug.
“I’m sorry,” he mutters, voice cracking.
“Never apologize to us. I just wish I could take the fucking nightmare away from you,” Wilder replies, gripping his shoulder.
“Me too, brother,” Merrick says, sounding serious for once.
“We would all bear them for you if we could,” Logan adds as we circle around Aiy, protecting him from the invisible force reaching for him beyond the grave.
“I know,” he whispers, letting us hold him together.
“Do you want to talk about it?” I ask. He always says no, but I keep asking anyway. When I was younger, my therapist explained how important it was for me to talk about what happened. She said it would help me, but it never did. Maybe I’m just too broken, or I didn’t trust her since I’m pretty sure my parents only took me to her to find something wrong so they could get rid of me.
It might work for Aiy though.
I wait for the usually clipped refusal, but he hesitates before shaking his head. I’m wearing him down. I don’t need to know the details of what happened, since we’d worked it out before he calmly explained some of it. I won’t pry, but I don’t want him bottling it all up and exploding. He needs to heal. If anyone deserves to, it’s Aiyaret.
“Okay, will you be able to sleep?” I ask softly.
He swallows and looks away. “Not yet. I’m going to shower, then I’ll try.”
It’s a lie, but we don’t call him on it. He’s going in there to cry, and there’s nothing we can do but keep proving we are here for him, so we let him slip away. All of us watch him enter the bathroom before climbing into our beds, but I know we will lie awake, staring at the ceiling as we listen to his muffled sobs.
Our hearts crack with each one, his pain becoming ours until we are one.
Maybe that’s why we all get along so well, because we are all broken beyond repair and instead of doing ourselves in, we throw ourselves into situations where all we have to feel is adrenaline.
That’s the thing about adrenaline, though, and going full speed for so long—eventually the high wears off and you are left in the aftermath.
Then you have to worry because you can’t outrun your demons forever.
SEVEN
AIYARET
My bloodshot eyes burn, and no matter how many times I splash them with cold water, they don’t reduce in puffiness. My hair is wild, sticking up at all angles, as I grip the sink and glare at myself, seeing nothing but a stranger.
